(from media.photobucket.com/image/confidence/LukaBrazzi/)

It all started in middle school when we became old enough to learn about judging people, possibly even earlier. When we were young you befriended people based on commonalities not based upon looks or a person’s social status, “popularity”. I was never the most popular person in school but I learned that that’s not all that matters in life it comes down to much more than that. I went through my awkward stage from about 6th to 8th grade, where every day I was totally embarrassed to walk into homeroom and have people judge me. For those three long years I wore sweatpants and a sweatshirt just about every day to school to almost hide myself. Something hit me after graduating middle school, I thought to myself I cannot go through life caring about what people think about me and say behind my back so I came into my freshman year with a whole new attitude.

The First Day of high school I wore a beautiful while floral dress and I was confident! I was on the cheerleading squad and met some really great people and some not so great people. My entire freshman year things went great for me and I loved my life. Then came around sophomore year and I made a few really big mistakes and then I went back into my hiding state. Once again I cared about what everyone was saying about me and befriending people I did not care for just to say I was friends with them. Then came junior year I was still hanging out with all these people I didn’t like and one day I came to lunch and all the seats at my lunch table were full and everyone was talking about me. That’s when I had to turn to the last resort, sit at the table with people I always thought of as weird. Every day from then on out I sat at the table I thought was full of weirdos and they turned out to be some of the best people I had ever met they always had my back no matter what happened to me throughout school, and those same people I am still friends with to this day.

After high school my attitude changed once again and I was back. I now know to give people a chance and to listen to them and get to know them before I shut them down. My life if so wonderful now and it isn’t hard work to have a wonderful life, if you just stay open minded and optimistic you will live a life full of wonderful experiences with a group of amazing people to share it with.

© 2012, Kristen G.. All rights reserved.

Letting go is definitely easier said then done…or is it?

(Picture from http://jnkhoury.blogspot.com/)

I came across a really great meditation technique focused on this idea of letting go in Jack Kornfield‘s “The Wise Heart: A Guide to the Universal Teachings of Buddhist Psychology“. I’ll share my experience and the technique so you can try it for yourselves.

I sat down, took my meditative posture (spine straight, body relaxed, etc), and began focusing on my breath. I brought to mind some feelings and thoughts that stifle me. I thought of how I have a habit of holding on to people. These days I can see more clearly my tendencies to hold on to the pictures I paint of people. I paint my likes and dislikes of them, my own expectations of them as a friend, a lover, a relative, their physical appearance, and personality traits among other things. I can create masterpieces and I have no doubt that we all can and we all do.

The problem: taking my creations for the real thing.

The truth of the matter: as fantastic as our masterpieces may seem, they aren’t real.

(Picture from http://jnkhoury.blogspot.com/)

They are projections, interpretations, and completely made up. Don’t get me wrong I’m grateful to have such a wild imagination, but I would rather direct my imagination to create masterpieces that encourage freedom and connection as opposed to trapping people in stereotypes, judgments, and labels.

By focusing on my breath and simply noticing any thoughts or emotions, I began to create space to observe my old habits of holding on to people. Sometimes it’s hard to face your own thoughts so I constantly remind myself to be gentle and have compassion. I visualized a sphere around my body radiating out from my heart. I felt my heart expand with every breath and said to myself “let go, let go”. As my heart expanded it pushed away all negativity to the outer circumference of the sphere where I visualized negativity as different objects or people as I had made them out to be (sort of like planets circling around a sun). The more I breathed the more my heart space grew and expanded the sphere pushing the negative objects further outward. I could visualize other peoples’ spheres as well (like other solar systems). So what of the negative objects? I was having a hard time with them. Do they dissipate or dissolve into space? Do they just crash into each other as people all expand their heart spaces? Do they transform into something else? I couldn’t find any knowledge about this or even visualize it. Next thing I knew the idea hit me: you can’t understand this because these things are not real.

And letting go just got easier. I felt a surge of freedom, fearlessness, compassion, and excitement to keep letting go and creating space within my heart. As my day went on I found myself flowing through my day with ease and joy.

In Buddhism the idea that the world is an illusion is called “Maya“. Buddhists believe that what we paint with our minds is an illusory interpretation of reality. If we can practice letting go and recognizing Maya, we will see reality more clearly and enjoy reality for what it truly is.

(Picture from http://jnkhoury.blogspot.com/)

Here is the letting go exercise from “The Wise Heart” (255-256):

“Letting go does not mean losing knowledge we have gained from the past. The knowledge of the past stays with us. To let go is simply to release any images and emotions, grudges and fears, clinging and disappointments that bind our spirit. Like emptying a cup, letting go leaves us free to receive, refreshed, sensitive, and awake.

To practice letting go, let yourself sit comfortably and quietly. Bring a kind attention to your body and breath. Relax into the ground of the present for several minutes.

Now bring into awareness any story, situation, feelings, and reactions that it is time to let go of. Name them gently (betrayal, sadness, anxiety, etc.) and allow them the space to be, to float without resistance, held in a heart of compassion. Continue to breathe. Feel the unhappiness that comes from holding on. Ask yourself, “Do I have to continue to replay this story? Do I have to hold on to these losses, these feelings? Is it time to let this go?” The heart will know. Ask yourself if it is indeed wise to release this holding. Feel the benefit, the ease that will come from this letting go.

Now begin to say to yourself, “Let go, let go,” gently, over and over. Soften the body and heart and let any feelings that arise drain out of you like water draining out of a tub. Let the images go, the beliefs, the self-righteousness, the unworthiness. Let it all go. Feel the space that comes as you let go, how the heart releases and the body opens.

Now direct the mind to envision the future where this circumstance has been released. Sense the freedom, the innocence, the ease that this letting go can bring. Say to yourself “Let go” several more times. Sit quietly and notice if the feelings return. Each time they return, breathe softly as if to bow to them, and say kindly, “I’ve let you go.”

The images and feelings may come back many times, yet as you continue to practice, they will eventually fade. Gradually the mind will come to trust the space of letting go. Gradually the heart will be easy and you will be free.“

Love & Light,

~Ami 

© 2012, Ami Madeleine Daichman. All rights reserved.

Wheelchair (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Some people might know that last year I had a mental illness called Chronic Pain Syndrome for 6 months.  I was wheelchair bound for 3 months and I had pain in every single joint. It was hard to move without crying or screaming, I thought that this was it for the rest of my life. Many people dont know, but I was suicidal. Half my time I was in the hospital either having scans or with needles in my arms taking blood and doctors telling me that I was lying to get some attention, and I started to believe it myself. I managed to get hold of a wheelchair on loan from the British Red Cross. I noticed that people started treating me differently like trying to help me open doors and calling me ‘sweetie’ and they started wheeling me around everywhere without my permission to do so. I didnt like it because before my illness no one did any of those things to and for me. People looked down on me and took pity on me, I hated every single moment of it. 

I finally got referred to a hospital in London, called Great Ormond Street Hospital which specialises in children.  Within half an hour of me being looked at and moved around, the doctors knew what was wrong with me. With my very supportive family it took 8 weeks to recover from CPS. It was hard and tiring but finally I got better.

When I got back to school I had to work extremely hard to catch up on the work I had missed, but I did and I made my end of year targets and a bit above. Through out this illness I learned many lessons, lessons that have made me stronger in so many different ways.  I learned that you have to stay strong and believe that even though your in this position, you can still enjoy life. I learned that you have to make each day count because you never know whats going to happen next.  I feel lucky that today Im not living in the wheel chair; I’m very much healthy.  I feel very grateful of where I am today: happy, healthy and enjoying life to the maxium.

-Emma Sophie Louise.

© 2012, EmmaSophieLouise. All rights reserved.

Written By: Elizabeth C.

Recently I saw the newest movie with Sarah Jessica Parker and Pierce Brosnan called “I Don’t Know How She Does It“. In this movie Sarah is a working mom trying to balance the challenges of work and home life while still keeping her priorities straight. The other characters in the movie see her as some amazing supermom and she sees it as just wants to give her kids the same opportunities as the other kids in her class. This started me thinking about how that phrase “I don’t know how she does it” and how people apply that to my life.

People always say “I don’t know how she does it” to me referring to my attitude about my disability.

When I ask them what they mean when they say that they respond with something like “How do you keep such a positive attitude in spite of all that has happened to you? How do you do it?” Well I am here today to tell you how I do it.

1) I Do It Because I Have To:

I would never wish a disability on anyone, myself included, but I have one and nothing will ever change that circumstance but I can change my attitude and I may as well make the most of it and embrace it.
 

2) I Do It Because I Want To:

I want others to see me as a positive influence and a positive person. I don’t feel sorry for myself and I don’t want others to either. I want to be like everyone else.

3) I Do It Because My Disability Is Part Of What I Deal With, It Doesn’t Define Me:

Too often on tv and in movies I hear people use the phrase ‘disabled person’ instead person with a disability’. I am a person first, my disability is second. Keeping my attitude positive about my disability and raising awareness of these things helps others to see that it isn’t all bad and i am a person first.
 

4) I Do It Because Every Day Is A Gift I Am Given:

Would it be easy to sit around feeling sorry for myself or pity for the things i can’t do? Yes we all do it from time to time. We forget about the things we have and focus on what we don’t. I could choose to be negetive about my disability, but I don’t. Instead I stay positive and remember that each day I am given is a gift, the disability i’ve been given in this life is a gift to be used teach others. Everyday is a gift, so why waste time being negetive when I could spend that time unwrapping all the new and exciting adventures life has to give me.
 

5) I Do It Because Rather Than Asking “Why?”, I’d Like To Say “Why Not Me?”:

When you have a disability it’s easy to ask why me? It all goes back to the attitude again. I believe that there’s no point in wasting time asking why because only God knows that. I’d rather ask why not me and be positive about it, because I am a stronger person for it. Why not? I have nothing to lose.

Written By: Elizabeth C.

© 2012, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Written By: Jen Pereira

Wow! How do I even begin to describe my experiences at MDA Summer Camp?

Well, I can start by stating how amazing camp is. The campers, the atmosphere, the counselors and staff, and especially the events throughout the week are incredibly amazing! MDA Summer Camp has changed my life dramatically and has caused me to be a lot more optimistic in my life.

The kids that attend camp are absolutely amazing human beings. When I first arrived at camp I did not know what to expect, but it was very easy to get in the swing of things once the campers arrived. These kids are extremely happy and they do not act as if they have muscular dystrophy. I assumed I would be dealing with a depressing and upsetting environment, but I cannot even begin to explain how much fun and joyful camp is. My camper even convinced me to get my face painted so that I look like a man with bushy eyebrows, a mustache, and a beard! I consider that to be one of the funniest moments in my life, and an interview of me with my face painted even ended up on national television! I would have thought this was absolutely embarrassing if I did not love camp so much.

MDA Summer Camp has changed my life for the better. I have been a counselor for two summers, and this upcoming summer will be my third year with this wonderful kids. I have been so touched by these campers and a hole in my heart has definitely been filled by them. I am no longer taking my life for granted and I am dedicating more of my time to others in need. I plan on volunteering at camp for as long as possible because I cannot imagine a summer without camp! By the end of the week I knew my campers as fun and loving kids, not as kids who had a disease, and that is how everyone should look at them. Even though some of the campers that I come to know graduate and no longer be able to returned to camp for the summer, I hope I have been able to bring some happiness and fun into their lives, even if it was just for a short amount of time.

Everyone should greatly consider becoming a counselor at MDA Summer Camp! It really will change your life dramatically and provide a better outlook on life!

Written By: Jen Pereira

Please comment below if you enjoyed my friend Jen’s touching post! :)

© 2012, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

I read this recently…

OPTIMISM is the key,

If you expect the WORST, the WORST will happen

You are your own STRESS, your own ANGER

Your own SADNESS and FRUSTRATION

If you let things bother you, they WILL

So don’t let them. Just be HAPPY! :-)

NOTHING in life is easy, so make the best of all of it.

Don’t dwell on the NEGATIVES

OPTIMISM is the key 

© 2012, Haylee Prowse. All rights reserved.

I’ve known Anthony for about four years and is undoubtedly the most happy and optimistic person I have ever met. He has always lifted the spirits of the people he meets and is constantly teaching people how to be as happy as they can. Anthony has always been the guy to make me feel better on a bad day and I’m glad to be able to say that I DO know him.

Everyone goes through difficult times. They are always different and are always handled a different way. However, what is always constant is the urge to want to fight through it. There is always a chance of the idea of optimism. If the foundation and joys of your life start to fade, it is important to try to keep faith in yourself. It’s important to tell yourself it will be okay, because it will be.

Optimism is something that Anthony knows well and portrays well. It’s imperative that we start thinking more highly of ourselves.

Thank You, Anthony.

(response from Anthony DeVergillo)
I am so glad that my Optimism has rubbed off onto you, whoever you are…

© 2012, Annonymous. All rights reserved.

It was always my dream to meet Jerry Lewis. Over the last 20 or so years of my 25 years of being on Earth, I was the kid who stayed up and watched all 21 and a half hours of Jerry’s annual telethon for muscular dystrophy, before I even realized what the show was for, why it was on my television, and just who was hosting it.

As I grew, I learned about Jerry’s partnership with Dean Martin, I watched some of his movies (“Disorderly Orderly” is my favorite); I knew of his successes and failures, his fans and detractors. However, I never ever dreamed I would really meet him, despite multiple people, actually at least 100 people, probably hundreds more, saying things like, “I hope you meet him”, or “you deserve to meet him”, or “that would be so awesome if you met him” over the course of the last decade. I believed I would meet him, I just didn’t know how or when.

So, when it was announced that my idol (or as I called him, “God”) was celebrating his 86th birthday (March 16, 2012) the day before my 25th one (March 17, 2012), my dad and I resolved to go, and I vowed to at least be in the same room as my inspiration.

I should explain that despite living with cerebral palsy, I not only watched Jerry’s telethon for muscular dystrophy until Jerry’s sudden, unexpected “goodbye” in 2010, I actively participated it, first as a volunteer in my hometown, then as a presenter who turned in to a local host on the 2008 New York City broadcast. In the process, I’ve raised well over one hundred thousand dollars for kids with muscular dystrophy to go to Muscular Dystrophy Association (MDA) camp in Spring Valley, New York and I’ve added a second camp site, Jett Foundation’s Camp Promise East as well. So, I felt it was my duty to show my loyalty to Jerry.

The celebration was actually split into two parts, one half was for the public in the form of a lecture and Q&A session at the 92nd Street YMCA in Manhattan, the other was a semi-private party at the hallowed Friar’s Club also in Manhattan.

Leading up to the show, I had been having a rough stretch of days in my life but tried my best not to complain, publicly or otherwise, though it was hard. While my birthday was mere hours before Jerry’s, I lost my mom a week after my 19th birthday in 2006, so my emotions were somewhat jumbled. Add in a job search that seemed to be stuck in “neutral” and “cabin fever” from being told I wouldn’t be able to drive (yet – I depend on my dad to drive me around for now), and I knew I was in desperate need of pulling out the one universal weapon that both Jerry and I (but especially Jerry) were really good at using in times of stress and trouble: laughter.

After a lengthy discussion with Richard Belzer (Law and Order, all 98 versions) on Jerry’s movies and other things, including Jerry claiming he didn’t retire, he was fired from the telethon by MDA (Jerry’s claim, not mine, here’s a link to where he said it!), the time for questions from the audience came. (It was so hot in the auditorium, I actually got nervous and had to regroup with a drink of water and watch most of the show in an air conditioned room next to the auditorium.)   

My father was worried I wouldn’t have a good question, since Jerry told the audience that we didn’t need to tell him how much we loved him – some people did, and got a playful, sometimes annoyed Jerry to deal with, yet, to be fair, all of us there that night were used to “angry Jerry”, having seen much of his body of work.

When I rolled down to the stage, a grin began to form on Jerry’s face as if I was a ray of sunshine peaking through the clouds of people saying “I love you!” that was giving him a headache.

Loud enough for everyone to hear, he and I spoke.

“Hi Jerry!”, I said, not loudly, but louder than most of the others in the audience had been.

Jerry replied: “Hi, could you speak a little softer?”

I whispered, “okay”, and there was that sound I was looking for – LAUGHTER. I knew I had the audience’s attention now.

“Jerry, I don’t want to tell you I love you because you know that already, but my name is James Lacerenza, I have cerebral palsy and I’ve sent about 50 to 100 of your “kids” to camp. I just want you to know you’re my hero.”

The audience, without me asking, broke into applause for about 15 seconds, probably a bit longer.

“James”, Jerry said, “I remember you, yes. I know all about what you’ve done. Are you Italian?”

Of course, I said, “yes!”

Jerry uttered: “I can smell the garlic breath from here!”.

A wave of laughter came from everyone, including me.

Jerry continued: “What’s your question, sweetheart?”

I replied: “I wanted to know what advice you had for me raising more money for the kids, and if you could give me a hug after the show.”

Then, the words I never thought I’d hear came from Jerry: “I’ll meet you backstage after the show to do exactly that.”

More applause followed, and my body and brain felt a mix of emotions: shock, happiness, nervousness, excitement, bliss, being extremely grateful and fortunate, all rolled into one. I also silently thanked my mother. I knew she had planned this somewhere in heaven.

A half hour later, after patiently waiting for the end of the show, in the dual basement and garbage room of the YMCA, the elevator door rolled open, and here came Jerry BLEEPING Lewis.

We shook hands as Jerry said, “I was looking for you! Where’d you go!”

I shot back: “Well, your crew made me hard to find, which isn’t easy most days.” A grin came over his face as he leaned in towards me and I grew serious in tone.

“So, what advice would you give me to raise money? I don’t want to be Jerry Lewis, I want to be James Lacerenza, but carry some of your compassion.”

“Well, that’s a good start, you have to be you and you also have to trust your gut”, Jerry chimed back.

“I want to just be a tenth as good as you at helping people. What else would you recommend?”, I asked.

“Don’t let anyone or anything negatively influence you. Try to surround yourself with positive people and thoughts and good things will happen. They already have!”, he exclaimed, referring to my previous years of work.

Jerry had to catch a bus to the Friars for his birthday dinner, but not before a hug, a kiss on the forehead, and one other request.

“Jerry”, I said, giddy with happiness – could we yell “HEY LADY” together?

And there it was, me and Jerry, smiling, laughing, and in a whiny, high pitched voice that we both knew how to do from all of his movies….there goes that “LAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY-DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!”

“Remember what I said”, Lewis intoned as he gazed into my soul and I gazed back into his: “TRUST YOUR GUT and you’ll go far.”

From that moment on, my spirit, and for that matter, my stomach and all of its intestines, have never felt stronger.

© 2012, James Lacerenza. All rights reserved.

I find myself in recent days to be quite the lonely drowsy individual. I decided to be different today. To do something that would make me proud, or just excite me. I did a few things. I painted my nails lime green and turquoise half and half diagonally. They look pretty sweet. I also took a pair of black tie dye pants I had and cut the bottoms off to create headbands which I bleached in different tie dye styles. I also cut the knees of the pants into the classic slits which look cool. All of this inspiration came from my friend Texanna. Shout out to her for being an awesomely creative person who I look up to. I feel good today. I’m excited to wear the stuff I altered/made, and I’m feeling good overall. I think that creativity of any sort is a stepping stone for awesomeness. Whenever I’m feeling down and what not I do something new, something fresh and exciting. Last week I picked up a ukelele on a trip to Sam Ash with my friend Michael. That store is awesome by the way. I learned a few songs pretty quickly. I had always been depressed because of the fact that I couldn’t play guitar, but when I saw the ukelele I was like this is almost perfect. It’s small enough to be able to hold on my own, and I can actually position my fingers well enough to play a few chords. It brought me a burst of happiness. It’s also just a happy instrument all around.

If you’re feeling down today do something productive or, just lay around and relax yourself. There’s nothing wrong with that I do it all the time. I use tumblr (http://xkarmaxkills.tumblr.com/) so I skim through that, I throw on some tunes and just chill. Those days are awesome to. If anyone reads this and there are any topics you’d like me to write about I’d be glad to! Until then it’s just little ole me. Have a good day/night.

I’m going to continue my day wheeling along… 

© 2012, WheelingAlong. All rights reserved.

Go ahead, text him first – he might be checking his phone, waiting for you.

Stare into the eyes of the guy you like – memorize the color.

Turn on your iPod and run as far as you can.

Say hi to a stranger – you never know what they’ll become for you.

Have a mental health day – you know you need it.

Don’t go on facebook for a day and see what you can accomplish.

Give money to a charity, call an old friend, your good karma will come around eventually. 

Sneak out, you might get caught, but it’ll be 100% worth it.

Tell that one person that you like them, what’s the worst that can happen?

He doesn’t like you back? Then he doesn’t deserve you anyways, right?

Treat yourself to something indulgent, you deserve it.

Smile at a stranger, it could make their day.

Wink, it’s sexy and makes you feel confident. After all, you are pretty hot.

Go for somebody who is totally wrong for you, they may not be totally wrong after all.

Stand up for yourself, because if you don’t, who will?

Moral of the story is, YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE!

© 2012, Haylee Prowse. All rights reserved.

Take a moment to remember the last meal or snack you ate today.

What was your experience like?

Can you even remember what you ate?

Too often we rush through meals, distract ourselves with television, and make unconscious, unhealthy choices of what to eat. Is life really so demanding that we have to grab something on the go and wolf it down? Or are we just too wrapped up in the hustle and bustle of our culture to realize that we have the power to slow down and really enjoy our experience of eating even amongst our busy schedules?

Who is in control here?

Think again of the kind of experience you had with your last meal or snack.

Remember what it looked like, tasted like, smelled like, whether it was hot or cold, the ingredients, where the ingredients came from, and who or what contributed to making the meal or snack possible.

Even now as we think about these things in hindsight, we can feel a sense of enjoyment, fulfillment, and deeper appreciation and connection to our experience. When we apply these sorts of sensory and contemplative inquiries to our experience moment in which it occurs, we are being mindful. In his book “The Wise Heart: A Guide to the Universal Teachings of Buddhist Psychology”, Jack Kornfield explains:

“Mindfulness is attention.

It is non-judging and respectful awareness.

Mindfulness brings perspective, balance, and freedom.

With mindfulness, understanding unfolds naturally.

When we meet the world with recognition, acceptance, investigation, and non-identification,

we discover that wherever we are, freedom is possible,

just as the rain falls on and nurtures all things equally”.

When we bring a practice of mindfulness to eating, we can develop a deeper sense of gratitude, connection, enjoyment, and nourishment with our food, our bodies, the company we eat with, and the whole universe if you really think about it. As mentioned before, connecting to our senses is a great way we can be mindful of our present experience of eating. Lyla Yastion, spiritual healer and professor of anthropology, religious studies, and philosophy, calls the practice of mindfully connecting to our senses as a way to rest peacefully in the present moment “pausing”. In her book “Pause Now: Handbook for a Spiritual Revolution”, she says:

“Coming to our senses means that a conscious reactivation of seeing, hearing, touching, smelling, and tasting brings the faculties of mind-heart into the present.

And, conversely, being-present means that the
senses are operating in a conscious manner.

We can taste food consciously and thereby measure the amount we eat by the activation of the discriminating faculty of mind, or we can overeat, oblivious of the quality or amount.

Just as a dull knife will cut better when sharpened so the senses enable
appropriate action when they are employed consciously.”

Here are some guidelines from my own understanding and experience on how to “pause” with your food:

1. Sit down comfortably with your food and take a moment to relax. Let the stresses of your day dissolve and notice the environment you are in. Really be where you are.

2. Once you feel relaxed, look at your food. Using the sense of sight, notice without judgment as many details as you can: color, shape, texture, form, etc.

3. Using the sense of smell, go ahead and smell your food. Breathe in the scents fully and deeply.

4. Using the sense of touch, bring your food slowly to your mouth. Feel it at each part of the mouth as it enters: the lips, the tongue, the roof, etc. Notice the way it feels. Notice the temperature.

5. Using the sense of taste, notice if the food is sweet, bitter, sour, spicy, etc. As you are tasting, contemplate the ingredients. What are you eating? Trace each ingredient’s journey to your mouth: back to your plate, the packaging, the store or market, the truck or ship it might have been carried on, the earth it was planted in. Bring to mind all of the people, creatures, and forces of nature that contributed such as the sun, water, soil, etc.

6. Once you have completely tasted and chewed, swallow. Feel the food traveling down into your stomach and only then reach for your next bite.

7. Your sense of hearing may come into play while you are chewing or if you have company to speak with. Notice different kinds of sounds and different volumes. Listen carefully. It can be hard to keep your attention on your food and company simultaneously. Do your best to be patient and moments of silence to focus are okay.

Some alterations you might find more suitable for your experience might  be to:

• Contemplate the ingredients and journey of your food while it’s on your plate
• Eat in silence to help focus your attention.
• Speak a declaration or prayer of gratitude before eating to cultivate appreciation

One thing I like about Buddhist teachings and teachings on mindfulness is that they encourage us to test out the practices and theories for ourselves. It can be challenging to snap out of our mechanical patterns and it can be hard to remember to be present. But don’t lose hope. Like anything else, go at your own pace and any amount of practice helps. I encourage you to challenge your busy, habitual lifestyle, taking control with a compassionate heart, and bring mindfulness to your experience of eating.

See what happens for yourself. Bon Appetit! 

Love & Light,

~Ami

© 2012, Ami Madeleine Daichman. All rights reserved.

  

© 2012, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

My friends Charley & Jesi are trying to motivate with music, but at a slower pace… Charley Hinchcliffe, an L.A. local met Jesi Di Palo at an open mic night in October of 2008 and have been writing and performing music together ever since. They are now engaged and have just formed their own record label, Wini Flashdance Records, in which they just released their second album that’s self titled, “Charley & Jesi.” For their second album, they recorded at the Village Recorder and hired some of the top musicians in Los Angeles including two-time Latin Grammy winning drummer, Julio Figueroa, top session bassists, K.T. Tyler and Daniel Baker, Glendale native that Charley met at jazz band at Hoover High School. They mastered the record at Capitol Records by Robert Vosgien, known for his work with No Doubt’s Tragic Kingdom. After self producing, promoting and managing both albums, they decided to form their own record label. “Nowadays making music is so accessible to anyone and being that we have the do it yourself attitude, it just makes sense. We’re not waiting for someone to make our dreams come true, we’re doing it ourselves.” Enjoy the motivating song, “Wake Up”, by my friends, Charley & Jesi, below…

Check out more of Charley & Jesi below: aaa Please comment below if you enjoyed this motivational song! :)

© 2012, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

My friend, Jim Gaven, just like me, is all about spreading Optimism through music. Armed with the goal of helping others, Jim Gaven’s mission is to write songs that make you think of a good time in your life, make you feel good about yourself, and most of all, put a smile on your face. The upbeat singer/songwriter from Hamilton, NJ wants to make a positive difference in the world and truly believes that music has the ability to do that. Quoted as saying, ‘I want to inspire you to do great things as I have been inspired. The fact that you can create something out of nothing and have it last forever is amazing to me.’ This is a true testament to the everlasting impact we can all have on each other, and Jim hopes to bring that kind of attitude to the forefront through song. Enjoy the inspiring song, “Something To Hope For”, by my friend, Jim Gaven, below…

Check out more of Jim Gaven below: aaaaaaaaa Please comment below if you enjoyed this inspirational song! :)

© 2012, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

How can a Habitat for Humanity turn into a Habitat for Optimism? Read Carolanne’s post to see how…

This Is Africa

Written By: Carolanne Monteleone

You’ve seen the pictures of a frail, thin-to-the-bone, child in Africa. You’ve watched the heart wrenching commercials of a similar child frowning at the camera, with big pleading eyes. You think you know what poverty is. Maybe you’ve been poor yourself. But in reality, you cannot even begin to imagine how lucky you are.

I traveled to a little country in the south eastern part of Africa in August of 2010 called Malawi. I was 18 years old, fresh out of high school. I had signed myself up to journey half way across the world to a third world country with a group of strangers I was partnered with through Habitat for Humanity. Habitat for Humanity builds homes for families in need all across the world.

I watched a little girl in tattered clothes eat a piece of paper she found on the ground, because that would be her only meal for the day. I played with a baby boy whose foot was deformed but would never get medical attention. I spoke with a young lady who wanted to go to school past 8^th grade, but couldn’t afford it.  I held a baby in my arms whose mother died of a simple flu.

How do you stay optimistic in front of these beautiful children who despite all their problems, continue to have a smile on their face? I realized on this trip that I was not Superwoman, and I could not save the world. But what I did realize was that I could change the world for a few people. And I was already in the right direction. I watched the people of Malawi, who were in great poverty, live like God had blessed them with the most beautiful gift: life.

The people I met on this trip taught me to live my life to the fullest, keep a smile on my face, and treat every challenge that I encounter as an adventure. It’s impossible to not be optimistic when your life has been forever changed for the better.

Optimism saves lives…

Written By: Carolanne Monteleone

©2012 Carolanne Monteleone. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Did you enjoy Carolanne’s post, This Is Africa? Comment below to answer.

© 2012, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

© 2012, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Millions of people out there, even those not affected by Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy – a fatal, muscle-deteriorating disease that slowly weakens muscles and affects 1 in 3500 boys worldwide – live life pessimistically. And the same can be said for people affected by the disease. They believe that “There is NO Hope” and that “They Are Weak” and cannot really see a bright future. This leads to the constant increase in pessimism for the men living with DMD and for the people that care for and about them.

But what if I said that I had real evidence to support that life is truly beautiful and can be lived to the fullest?

What if I told you that There Is Hope and YOU ARE STRONGER?

Don’t believe me? Then watch the video above…

You Are Stronger Links:

YouTube – http://www.youtube.com/user/YouAreStronger1

Facebook – http://www.facebook.com/YouAreStronger?sk=app_174225559282949

Blog – http://www.anthonysabilities.com/blog/yas/

Twitter – http://twitter.com/#!/youarestronger1

© 2012, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

I was watching X-Men 2 a few nights ago and, being Optimistic and all, I found many ways to compare human beings to X-Men. Here are the characteristics of X-Men:

1) They have unique powers

2) They are shunned by parts of society

3) They underestimate themselves

4) They must learn to control their powers

We all have unique powers inside all of us, although they may not be as extreme as reading minds, controlling the weather, shooting lasers out our eyes, being indestructible, or teleportation abilities.  These powers could be the ability to write from your heart, to sing like an angel, to know how to comfort someone in their time of need, to paint a picture that’s worth more than a thousand words, and much, much more. But sometimes it may be hard for us to find what our true power is.  When I was in the first years of high school I was incredibly shy and did not feel like I was powerful at all. I had no idea what Optimism truly was and never once believed I could help people with my writing. But in my senior year all of that changed. I opened up myself and my true power was able to come to the surface. Sometimes you must learn to accept your power before you can use it or even know that it exists.  But, know this, you have a power that makes you a unique person, Use It!

Mutation. It is the key to our evolution.

Every few millennia, evolution leaps forward.

There are probably times we believe that no one is on our side. I used to believe the same when I felt apart from my peers at school. I felt like a reject since hardly anyone included me in his or her friendships or even knew who I was.  Here, unlike with the X-Men, your power can help you break down those boundaries that make you feel as if you are shunned by society.  By using your power, people that share your power and your interest will begin to notice you and will want to become your friend. If you enjoy writing, you will form relationships with other writers that enjoy writing as much as you do. If you are an artist, you will form bonds with other artists that feel the same joy as you do when creating works of art. If you are an Optimist, like me, you will form bonds with other Optimists that share your view of life being a beautiful thing. On the other end of the spectrum, if you are a pessimist, you will attract other pessimists and that can only make you more of a negative person. So find your positive power, use it, and people that share your interests will follow.

Nightcrawler: Then why not stay in disguise all the time?
You know, look like everyone else.

Mystique: Because we shouldn’t have to.

Never underestimate yourself; now I bet that you’ve heard those words many times. But those words are so true, and I can vouch for that. I used to underestimate myself all the time. I used to be scared to just go up and talk to someone and start a conversation, which may have turned into a friendship. I used to be scared of sharing my poetry and writing with others since I did not think any of it was good. But that underestimating only held me back from my true potential. Your power cannot truly be used completely until you believe in your heart that it can. An artist most often is the first to criticize his or her own work, and that is what stops him or her from showing it to the world. But by showing your true power to the world, that same person will realize that people actually like what their true power has created. In X-Men 2, one of the mutants does not believe he can teleport somewhere he cannot see, but he decides to try it when someone tells him that they believe in his true power. So be like that mutant, but believe in your own powers without someone telling you that it is okay to do so.

Storm: Can you teleport inside?

Nightcrawler: No. I have to be able to see where I am going;
otherwise I could wind up inside a wall.

Storm: I have faith.

Now there are ways that you can lose control of your true power. And the main way to do so is to brag about how strong your power is compared to the same power of another person. Bragging accomplishes nothing and only makes people not want to be around you. Greed may also lead you to lose control when you put moneymaking using your power above everything else. As soon as you just think about money, your power begins to become selfish and self-centered. No one wants to be around someone that puts money above their friends, their family, and their life overall. In the end, when you have all the money you could ever want, you’ll be wondering what happened to all of the friends that you used to have. A true power is not tainted by selfish wants and needs and belittling of others. A true power is one that you enjoy using and enjoy sharing with others. A true power is not one that makes you money or one that you make a living off of; it should be one that makes you who you are at the deepest level.  Deep down, you may be an artist; you may be a writer; you may be an innovator; you may be an Optimist! Don’t let anyone change that.

©2012 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Do you believe that We Are X-Men? Comment below to answer.

© 2012, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Wow I have reached my 50th Guide to Life post on my blog, I hope I don’t run out of ideas. :)

So this post is about doing things differently, something many of us don’t enjoy doing.  If you do something in a different way than you are used to, you may think that only increases your chances of failure.  But it truly does much better things for you.  By doing things differently you can look at life from a different perspective.  By doing things differently you can possibly find your true calling that you never knew existed before.  How do I know this? I’ve been doing things differently my entire life.

When I get up in the morning I cannot get myself dressed or into my chair.  I need to rely on either my parents or my nurse to assist me in all of that.  Once I am downstairs, my parents or my nurse have to help feed me breakfast and give me my medicine.  On weekdays, my nurse has to drive me to school and stay with me at college the entire day.  My nurse and my parents mostly have to be my arms and legs for me.  If I need a drink of water, someone has to get it for me and put a a straw in it so that I can drink it.  If I need a snack, someone has to get it for me. If my arm falls off of my armrest, someone has to put it back on the armrest for me.  If I want to use my computer, my little brother has to help me put my hands on the table and push the table closer to me so that I can reach my laptop. If I need to be dropped off somewhere, my parents have to drive me there.

But there are also many things that I do on my own differently. When I am typing this blog post, I have to use the part of my fingers on the back of my hand instead of the part on the palm of my hand since my hands are so tight. When I eat, I have to avoid foods that are too chewy or tough to eat since I have the risk of choking. When I want to turn the page in a textbook I try to turn it with my pencil by sticking it in between the next two pages and moving it to the left. When I want to do anything at all I have to think of different ways of doing it and be patient with myself.  These things may change my appearance, such as my feet splints and my wheelchair, but they also make me a stronger person.

I’ve been able to learn how to be patient with myself and people around me. I’ve been able to learn what the truly important things in life. I’ve been able to learn how to look past someone’s appearance and see the person they truly are inside. I’ve been able to listen to people when they talk about a problem they are having since I have been through a lot myself and I know how good it feels for someone to just listen. I’ve been able to keep on trudging on through life even when it seems there is nothing worth living for. I’ve been able to turn failure into a lesson to be learned, and many of those lessons I share here on my blog in the past 49 posts. Finally, I’ve been able to learn that Optimism is the best thing for not only me, but everyone else. Hence, my blog was able to begin and become what it is today. My blog was able to reach over 14,000 visitors from around the world in what will be a year in only two weeks. Now if doing things differently can make my life better, imagine what it can do for you.

Below is one example of how a group of singers were able to Do Things Differently:

©2012 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Do you ever Do Things Differently? Comment below to answer.

© 2012, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

© 2012, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

© 2012, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Written By: Danielle A. Cloakey

My newest friend has been through a lot in her life, but through it all she was able to stay strong and Optimistic.  Her story is unique, but the way she copes with everything throughout her journey can be useful to all of us.  Through it all she was able to proudly say, “I Will Survive.” I hope her story can help you in some way, here it is…

 

In early 1984, when I was 16 months old, I was diagnosed with neuroblastoma.  I had been walking funny, leaning to the left, depending on walls and furniture to help me stay balanced, and falling down a lot. My mother mentioned this to the nurse at my monthly checkup, and it was quickly brushed aside by the nurse. She said that it was probably nothing, and that all babies fall down a lot. But my mom insisted that they do tests on me. The tumor growth was on my right adrenal gland, on top of my kidney. I was scheduled for surgery right away, though they had to postpone it because I came down with a cold. After that surgery, I had another, minor one to install a Hickman line so that the hospital staff didn’t have to poke me every time they drew blood or gave me chemotherapy.

 

They removed about 50% of the tumor, and then started me on an aggressive chemotherapy protocol. I had some radiation as well, to try to kill the cancer cells. They ended up radiating half my spine too – there was no way around it – and it caused scoliosis,which is the abnormal curving of the spine, as I grew taller. I had another surgery, a “look-see” to see how much of the tumor remained. In the 1980s, they didn’t know a whole lot about treating cancer, and they knew even less about treating it in babies. Doctors and nurses were scrambling, trying really hard to save my life. One day, my dad got a phone call from a doctor, and she was crying. The cancer had spread. But later, they would find out that my test results had gotten mixed up with another patient’s, but by the time they figured that out, it was too late.

 

I had two really bad ear infections that were left untreated. The escalated to the point where I came down with a viral infection that attacked and damaged my brain stem. My parents rushed me to the ER because I was burning with fever and kept screaming that my legs hurt. At the hospital, I was sedated while they tried to figure out what was wrong with me. Over the next few days, my parents witnessed my body changing. I had been right-handed, but now my my right hand was curling into my wrist, and my body was as limp as a noodle. When the hospital released me, I was like a newborn baby again. I had no body strength (couldn’t balance enough to sit without support or even hold my head up). I couldn’t swallow, so I had to be nourished through an I.V. line. Couldn’t talk or anything, either.

 

I shudder to think what would have come of me if I had remained an only child. But as it so happened, my mom was 8 months pregnant with my brother Ryan at the time. I watched him for awhile, and then began to copy him. When he learned to crawl, I would pull myself along on my belly on the carpet much like a snake. And when Ryan learned to walk, I got strong enough to stand on my own two feet and walk with support. My parents didn’t figure out that I had hearing loss as well until I was five and a half, because I had quickly adapted to my new circumstances and taught myself how to read lips. By the time my other brother Patrick and my sister Jacqueline were born, I was well on my way.

 

Scoliosis slowed me down, but never for very long. I had my first back surgery in the middle of eighth grade, when I was fourteen. They only did a partial fusion then because they were afraid that if they did the whole thing, I wouldn’t be able to walk. After high school, I went to college – first at the local community college, and then I transferred to a four-year university to get my Bachelor of Arts in English. The year after I graduated was spent in pain. Finally, I’d had enough and had another surgery. I had been in pain because the work they did back when I was fourteen was breaking down. I spent five days in the hospital, and then when I came home and was getting ready for bed, I felt something give inside of me. I didn’t know how bad the pain was going to be until the next morning, when I tried to get out of bed. I couldn’t do it, at least not by myself. The pain was excruciating. It felt like my left leg was on fire (as if I knew what being on fire felt like). I screamed and cried every single day for the next four weeks, through two rounds of steroids. Finally they went in and fixed what was wrong, and I woke up after that surgery leg-fire free. Five years later, after 2 years of terrible pain in the morning when I got out of bed (this pain was only temporary, lasting ten minutes or so, but it came back every single day), I had what was hopefully my last back surgery. They fused the whole thing. With physical therapy, I relearned to walk for the third – and hopefully the last – time in my life.

 

Now that I am pain-free, I can focused on other things, things like writing and helping spread childhood cancer awareness. I hope to be a published novelist one day. I want to continue to share my story with others, and hopefully help them through my words and my life experiences. I want to teach the world the difference between pity and compassion, because there is indeed a difference. A big one.

 

One thing I really would like people to know is that I do not have cerebral palsy. It is easy to assume that, and really, why would you think otherwise? When I hear people talking about or even to me, cerebral palsy often comes up. I can’t get away from it. But labeling me with CP is like putting me into a box. I wasn’t born like this. I had cancer. Cancer. Everything within life – both the good and bad things – comes from outside the box. People should never assume they know another person’s story because chances are good that they are wrong. There are no limits to what can happen. The possibilities are endless. And, so too, is hope.

Written By: Danielle A. Cloakey

©2011 Danielle A. Cloakey. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Have something to say about this story?  Then please comment below. :)

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

I found this article in the Hunterdon County Democrat newspaper and thought it was the perfect story of how to celebrate the holidays, Optimistically of course…

Deck the halls.  Bake the cookies.  Wrap the gifts.  Clean the guest room, companies coming… The holidays are an exciting time of year, but there aren’t enough hours in the day!

This story has made the rounds and we’re not sure of its source.  But the message seems particularly appropriate at this time of year.  Here it is:

A philosophy professor stood before his class with several items on table.  He picked up one of them, a large empty jar, and filled it with golf balls.

He asked the students if the jar was full and they all agreed that it was. 

Then he picked up a box of small pebbles and poured them into the jar, shaking it lightly.  The pebbles went into the spaces between the golf balls.  He asked if the jar was full.  Again they said it was.

He produced a box of sand and poured it in.  The sand went between the pebbles.

He asked if the jar was full now.  The students gave a thunderous, “Yes.”

Then he produced two glasses of wine from under his desk and poured them in, effectively filling the spaces between grains of sand.

The students laughed.

“Now,” said the professor, as the laughter subsided, “I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.  The golf balls are important things; your family and children, your faith, your health, your friends, and your passions; things that if everything else was lost and they remained, your life would still be full.”

“The pebbles are the other things that matter, like your job, your house and your hobbies.  The sand is everything else; the little stuff.”

“If the sand in the jar first,” he said, “there’ll be no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.  The same goes for life.  If you spend all your time and energy on the little stuff, you’ll never have room for what is really important.”

“Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.  Play with your children.  Get medical checkups.  Take your partner to dinner.  Take one more run down the ski slope.  There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.  Take care of the golf balls first; the things that matter.  Set your priorities.  The rest is mostly just sand.”

A pupil put up her hand and asked about the wine.

The professor smiled.  “I’m glad you asked.  That reminds us that, no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a glass of wine with a friend.”

Happy Holidays Everyone!

©2011 Hunterdon County Democrat newspaper. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

What are the Little Things in your life? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Thanks to my amazing sister Jamie, I was featured in the December issue of Ode Magazine, a magazine for Intelligent Optimists, in the Inspiration section.  

Thank you from the bottom of my heart, Jamie, and thank all of you reading my blog for supporting me in my efforts to make the world a better place, one Optimist, and one smile, at a time! :)

Please comment below if you enjoyed my sister’s article in Ode Magazine! :)

© 2011 – 2012, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Key to Happiness

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

What do you think the Key to Happiness is? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

It May Be Raining

Written By: Christina Flanagan

It may be raining, however…

It feels like and smells like the air is cleaner.

The rhythm makes for a nice nap or good night sleep.

Nature is providing a free car wash.

It cools down a hot summer day.

It brings to life a world full of vibrant colors.

It provides a good excuse to stay in and perhaps

watch a movie, read a book or play a board game.

It makes mud and this can gift a great facial.

It allows you to experiment with a new curly hairstyle.

It causes you to slow down. This is necessary, on occasion, so you can regroup.

It offers a universal promise of hope when a rainbow manifests in the sky.

 The 
 message 
 here  is to look 
 for your silver lining 
 even when a rain cloud 
 shades the sun from view. 
 Take advantage of the gift 
 of growth not only given by 
 the rain but also given by 
 the physical and mental 
 slow down it offers 
 for us to enjoy! 

What do you think of the rain? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

It’s hard to believe that Ami just found her spectacular singing talent!  She is an amazing singer and, even though she is just starting out, she has her heart and soul poured into her music.  You can relate her lyrics to your own life and if you pay close attention, you can find a deeper meaning.  

Enjoy Ami D’s song and find what in life you are truly grateful for, and isn’t that what we try to think of on this Thanksgiving Day? :)

Find more of Ami’s songs at http://soundcloud.com/ami-madeleine.

Please comment below if you enjoyed Ami’s beautiful song! :)

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

I’ve been in the midst of contacting singers and other amazing people to help me bring my blog to the next level and spread my message of Optimism even further.  

(Shout Out to Lexxi Saal, Pastele, Lelica, Nalani and Sarina, Jean Mallia, Ami D, Christopher,
Alexa, Michelle Ferreira, PLEDGE, Jes Loren, Nicoletta, Antony Bitar, and many more!)

My blog and the message that it shares is about to go into the next stages.  I will be getting my message sent out beyond my blog itself through the lyrics of amazing singers and the words of inspiring people.  I cannot do all of this on my own and that is why I need your help.  If you know any amazing singers or anyone that you believe would be able to help me and my message out please click here to contact me. I hope you are ready for what The Optimist’s Guide to Life has in store, I know I am. :)

The following post is by my new teammate and new best friend in this Optimistic journey that we call life.  She has been through so much in her life, yet she is still Optimistic.  Her story will have to wait for another future post, but  I bet you may know someone like that in your own life and I bet that you are inspired by them.  And who wouldn’t be?  Those people are doing things we never thought possible and making it through days when the darkness sets in.  We are not so different from these people.  If, when times turn bad and the world seems to be falling apart, we have only a small amount of Optimism within, that is enough to make it through.  And doesn’t making it through all of that make us the same as the people who inspire us? I believe that it does.  So, without further ado, here is life through Christina Flanagan’s eyes…

“Inspiring one Mind at a time, sometimes two.”

          It is not a surprise that today’s college students have a lot to juggle and manage all on their own. Financial stressors along with relationship problems cause excess worry and anxiety. A majority of students ponder how they are even going to be able to pay for college.       

           Students are without a doubt being affected by the slowdown of the economy and they are coming to the realization that they may not get their dream job right after they graduate. According to methodsofhealing.com, “statistics on the stress levels of students in college reveal that 25% of students are poor at managing stress, while 58% report feeling worried about their grades. Additionally, 71% state that their grades have a direct affect on their level of stress.”       

            As a relief, music can serve all mankind as an escape from everyday overwhelming responsibilities of work, school, family and friends. Dating back to the years of Plato, the story went, “Music speaks what cannot be expressed, soothes the mind and gives it rest, heals the heart and makes it whole, flows from heaven to the soul.” Even today in the twenty-first century the story is still true. Many people eat, sleep, and breathe music. For some people its the lyrics and what the music is saying to them and for other people its the actual instruments and tunes that come from the songs. Regardless, these types of people can’t go throughout their day without music. It is a huge part of their life and it is their way of life.       

             Raff Illiano, Son of the owner of Virami’s Pizza in Flemington, NJ—one of many graduating students from RVCC, uses music to relax before studying so that he can focus with a clear head. Illiano said that “Music with meaning inspires me; something that will allow me to open my mind and think about something other than what people spend their money on these days and/or why they love their significant other really does the job. Artists such as Erykah Badu, Bob Marley, Tupac, and Coldplay – or Chris Martin in this case – inspire me with their music.” By clearing his head before studying, Illiano molded himself into a more open minded student.       

             Mike Zampella, an RVCC alumni and young business owner of Somerville, NJ’s Ritas Italian Ice said “music inspires me because I relate to it. When I’m having a bad day, all it takes is one song to turn my whole mood around. It is my escape route.” Some people use music to get a break from reality for a few minutes and in turn that eases their mind, body, and soul to go back into reality with a more positive attitude.      

           While Illiano used music before hand to avoid the side effects of stress, Zampella uses music to catch himself before the stress takes over. To switch up perspectives, Jimmy Izzo, a recent graduate and a musically inclined performer said “I write songs that express my personal experiences. Sometimes I am inspired by things I see or hear, which sparks an idea in my mind and I run with the idea, tying into my personal self as close as possible. Music inspires me because as an artist and I not only want to get better at my craft but because I think in a different perspective; a creative one. Izzo is just always consumed in music, therefore the effects of stress never get to hit him. This keeps Izzo ahead of the rest of the student population which is lucky for him, but maybe if other students were capable of seeing the effects of how music can really be that helpful, they might be more interested in learning it.     

           According to Lakhovsky’s theories on Music it helps “to soothe and strengthen a fatigued nervous system, decrease anxiety, release tension, induce sleep, and for a peaceful room ambiance. It promotes tranquility, rejuvenation, and serenity, and is ideal for quieting hyperactivity, reading, and constructively directing energy.” So as you music is not directed to a specific generation or “genre” of people. There is an actual variety of people who use Music in many ways in order to continue a positive lifestyle however they choose to do so.  

By: Christina Flanagan, Spring 2010.

Inspired by Mrs. Skole’s Writing For the Media Class @ RVCC, NJ.

Please comment below if you enjoyed Christina’s musical post! :)

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Pat Moeschen is 39 years old and a music teacher in New Hampshire.  He has Becker’s Muscular Dystrophy, which is a less severe form of Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy, and loves to play the drums.  I met him at the annual Parent Project Muscular Dystrophy conference this July and was inspired that, despite his disability, he still does what he loves to do, teaching children to play music. As you can tell, he also follows my motto, “Despite my disability, my abilities have NO bounds” and strives every single day to teach others the same.  

The following video is a glimpse into what Pat goes through every single day, and a lot of what I go through every day too.  You will see how he has adapted his van, house, and classroom to fit his needs.  The sling that he uses in the end is the same one that I use to get in and out of my bed.  My house is adapted for some of my needs too, just like his house, but instead of one floor, my house has three floors.  I use an elevator to go upstairs where my bedroom is and then use it again to get back down to ground level.  So, are you ready?  

Are you ready to see Life in Pat Moeschen’s Eyes?

Please comment below if you enjoyed or learned something from this video! :)

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Steve Jobs was an innovator that changed the world and his legacy will live on forever.  So what can we learn from his life?  The answer to that is, We Can Learn A LOT.

“The Apple doesn’t fall far from the Steve.”

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

When the power went out I bet many of you were wondering how having no power would affect your daily life.  Your life was already hard enough to begin with.  Your stress level was already at its limit.  And then the stress and problems of a power outage was added to it all.  So what is this situation an example of?  It is an example of our human resistance to change. 

When something is changed in our life we seem to get angry or concerned about it.  This anger and concern is what leads to riots and protests throughout the world.  Someone in the government makes a change and there is most often a group of people that don’t agree with it.  This disagreement sometimes may be based on reasoning, but it may also be based on anger and frustration due to our resistance to change.  After a few days or weeks with the change we may start to agree with it and wonder why we disagreed with it in the first place.  So wouldn’t it be better if we reduce our resistance to change before our anger gets the best of us?  I think so.

But first, let me give you a more specific example of how our resistance to change can make life more difficult.  Lets say that your friend does something that you do not completely agree with.  You cannot believe that they would ever do such a thing.  You then get angry with them for doing so without thinking about their side of the argument.  Then, the fight between friends begins and it seems like the disagreement will last forever.  But if you wait for the anger and frustration to dissipate and then talk to your friend it is more likely that the conversation will end in a hug. Hopefully, looking back, you and your friend will able to look back on that fight, not with anger, but with an open mind.  So wouldn’t you want a way to reduce that anger and resistance before it leads to breaking a friendship apart?  I have a way to make this happen.

First of all, you can count to ten and wait for the anger to subside before you respond to the change.  It is much easier to think clearly when anger is not clouding your judgment.  You can also try not to complain or make comments about the change.  Complaining only adds to the stress and makes the anger last much longer.  Thirdly, if you are in a fight with your friend, you can try to look at the situation through their eyes and with their perspective.  It will allow the anger to subside and also help you understand what your friend is going through.  It will also allow you to think of what to say to your friend to keep your friendship alive.  So what has this taught us?  It’s simple really…

“When something in your life has changed,
don’t let the anger make your life rearranged.”

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Take a step back and look around the room.  I bet you see so many things that you just take for granted.  A big screen television set with surround sound; a computer that allows you to read my blog and talk with people all around the world; maybe even a Wii or Xbox system. But did you ever realize how lucky you are to have these things? 

This week has been so brutal so many of us in the northeast region of America.  Just a little bit of innocent snow shut down power for most of the area. Some of us still are without power.  We feel as if we have lost many of the luxuries and conveniences of life. We feel trapped inside of our homes and the stress begins.  No heat, no hot water, no showers, no hot meals, and nothing to do.  Even with all these problems we must go on with our daily lives at work and at school as if nothing has happened.  We feel jealous of the people that are not affected and wish we were in their situation.  Most of all we feel that we cannot learn anything from this situation when truly we can.

Now think of the people around the world that face these problems every single day. There are people that are struggling to feed their children and themselves and end up starving themselves so that their children can survive.  Adding on to this, these same people do not have a place to call their own.  They are forced to live in the streets and drink polluted water and breath toxic air.  These people will be lucky to have the small things that we take for granted. 

Even though the power may be out everything is still there. Nothing is going to be taken away.  You still have your home, your friends and your family. All of the things that make you truly happy, you may be sitting around the candlelit table eating takeout but you’re with the important people in your life. When the power is on these same people may be around less. That’s what makes these times better then all the rest. People are not preoccupied with all the gadgets and gizmos, from watching the game on TV to delving yourself into virtual and unrealistic world of video games.

Let this power outage teach you a lesson. Let it show you what is really important in your life.  It may seem that all of life’s luxuries are tangible and rely on electricity to work. It’s not the objects in your life that make you happy; it’s the people that are brought together by the object itself. So go out into the world and look at everything and say… 

“I’m lucky to have what I have today.” 

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Enjoy this rap created by one of my friends at college! His words reach deep down into your soul and make you really think about your life as it is. The Khan Artist wants you to know that you are amazing no matter what others may think or what others may say. He doesn’t want you to let life’s troubles and problems slow you down and wants you to be able to say to yourself every single day, “This is me.”
Check out more of The Khan Artist below: aaaaaaaaa Please comment below if you enjoyed this great rap! :)

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

My inspiring friends at RVCC are just as amazing as can be! :) 

I never knew I would meet such an aspiring fellow

Though the clouds were gray, he still shined yellow

He could have sat around and sulked miserably

But he knew that was not the way life was suppose to be

He knew it was to enjoy every second that we have here

So he teaches to give, to help, to guide, and to love with no fear

No matter what is thrown at this young king

He will always be the champion fighting in the ring

He is strong and smart and there is no giving up

So lets join him now in the fight to lift the world up

Anthony you are constantly teaching me to smile and be optimistic everyday

You are a true amazing friend and I thank you in every way <3

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

A teenage pop singer/songwriter with a sophisticated twist is a good way to describe up-and-coming artist Jean Mallia. Playing piano at the age of four, singing since she could speak, and writing her first full length song at five years old, left no doubt in anyone’s mind that music was her drive. Picking up guitar and bass guitar at fourteen gave her the opportunity to create just the sound she was looking for. Growing up on boy bands like Hanson and N’Sync, Jean delivers a sound that’s pleasing to the ear butworks the mind. “I want to break the whole cliché of pop music being pure bubble gum music. I like to use lines, words, phrases, that aren’t normally heard in songs, while still capturing the pop get up and dance vibe.” says Jean when asked to describe her style of writing. This young New Jersey native brings music that gets your feet tapping and your head bobbing, with lyrics that lay out a whole story for you to enjoy.

Check out more of Jean Mallia below: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Please comment below if you enjoyed this amazing song! :)

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Ricki, Jessica, and Heather, my spectacularly amazing friends from RVCC; if you are reading this, I want you to know that you are all an Inspiration… :)

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

That was a time when we questioned why life was so hard.  A time when we wondered why someone would not be our friend. Then that all changed…  We met people that wanted to hang out with us.  We met people that laughed at our jokes and would be there for us.  Most of all, we met people that changed us forever and we felt True Acceptance.

I can relate to this.  In high school I was left out of friendships and relationships due to my disability.  Whenever I tried to make new friends I was always stopped dead in my tracks.  Then, my disability was the big thing that held me back.  It erected a barrier that was almost impossible for me to get through.  I could not hang out at someone’s house because there were steps in the way.  It was hard for me to talk to anyone since I was so used to being ignored and to being let down.  The more I tried the more I seemed to fail, and that led to me becoming shy as time went on.  I did not think that I would ever feel True Acceptance.

If people won’t easily open up to me, then why don’t I open up to them instead?  I decided to teach others about my disability and about optimism during my senior year of high school.  And I was surprised at the response that I got.  People began to talk to me more and finally connect with me.  Those that I had never talked to before became my friends and trusted me.  People told me that they were going through many of the same things that I was going through.  I was not the only one that felt left out and ignored.  I was not the only one that was shy and I was not the only one who wanted more with my life.  Most of all, I was not alone.

That is something that is hard for anyone to realize.  We see people around us having everything and find it hard to see through that veil we create.  No one has a perfect life full of friends that never get upset and no one is on top of the world.  To sum this concept up, here is a quote by the writer Ralph Waldo Emerson, “We are all inventors, sailing out on a voyage of discovery, guided each by a private chart, of which there is no duplicate.  The world is all gates; all opportunities.”  Once we realize this one simple concept we can finally feel True Acceptance.  We can find people that share our fears and that share our ideas and become their close friends.  We can share our thoughts about something and know that there is always someone out there that agrees with them.  Most importantly, we can work together and try to get through this game called life.  Well, not just get through it, but learn from it and live it to the fullest.

And I’m so glad that I’ve brought this concept of True Acceptance along with me.  The people that I met here are the nicest people that I have ever known.  They always give you a smile and do all they can to help each other out.  These amazing people aren’t, like in high school, striving to get the most friends and striving to be more “popular” than anyone else.  My newest and greatest friends are just trying to form friendships that will last as long as possible since they all know that we are in the same boat together.  Now that I know this myself I can give all that they give me back to them.  Not only do I now feel True Acceptance, my friends feel it too.  

Quoting High School Musical, “We’re all in this together!” 
And together, we can do this…

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Many of us feel that there is something always holding us back.  This is even more apparent when you have a disability.  Things that are normally very easy can be hard or apparently impossible for someone with a disability.  This constant let down feeling slowly makes those with, or even those without, a disability start to say “can’t” and “won’t” more and more often.   When people finally stop letting their physical weaknesses slow them down and let their hope, determination, and strength take hold, once impossible things become possible.  That may be the hardest thing for anyone to do, but once you do it, your life will change forever, and you will never look back after that.

We have heard of many people that have accomplished great things despite the odds being stacked against them.  One great example of this is Erik Weihenmayer, declared legally blind, who was able to climb to the summit of Mount Everest.  Many people affected by blindness would never dream of ever accomplishing this feat.  Erik showed everyone, including those just like him, that anything is possible if you believe that it’s possible.  The same can be said about a new TV show on ABC.

Everyday Health has a new TV series that profiles ordinary people who overcome extraordinary obstacles and who are helping others lead healthier, happier lives. It’s a show that I highly recommend you to watch since it not only shows you the triumph of the human spirit against, but it also makes you realize that you can and will accomplish your dreams, with or without a disability.

Episode 4 airs this Saturday, September 24th, on local ABC stations (click here to check local listings), and features Sarah Cronk, the inspirational teenager who founded The Sparkle Effect as well as Lauren Potter, the superstar Cheerio cheerleader on the hit show Glee. The Sparkle Effect is an innovative, student-run program that helps high school students across the country create cheerleading squads that include students with disabilities.

For more details on the show, recap episodes, and other information check out http://www.everydayhealth.com/tv.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

We Will Never Forget

As others ran down,

They trudged higher,

And on that day,

Their strength did not tire,

With all that they did,

It was us, who they inspire,

Even when our hope did die,

They kept climbing into the sky,

They are the heroes,

The ones we won’t forget.

As you watched the smoke,

The burning of the flame,

Your heart and mind,

Left and came,

You could not,

Believe your eyes,

When the planes crashed,

In the skies,

You are the one, who won’t forget,

When on 9/11, the sun set.

One step down,

Two steps down,

It’s hard to even grasp,

The ones still inside the tower,

That had the hardest task,

Our hope was always with them,

As they went through all of this,

In our hearts,

In our soul,

They are the ones we’ll always miss.

That one day,

Ten years ago,

Made us think,

“Where do we go from here?”

As we searched through the rubble,

“How can we carry on?”

As our hope slipped away,

“Is this the end?”

But just look at us now.

We will always still remember,

The ones that were lost,

Thinking back to that day,

Comes at a painful cost,

But we still trudge on,

Through the bad days,

That have come and gone,

But now we are all,

Together forever,

And ever and ever,

Again.

I see how that day,

Taught us lessons,

In every way,

How to come,

Together as one,

How to pass faith,

Onto your son,

That our future will be bright,

There are unbelievable things,

That will make America a beautiful sight.

With all our hope,

With all our liberty,

With all of our hearts,

Spread farther than we can see,

This is the message,

That we send,

That one day on 9/11,

Was not the end.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Will you ever Forget? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Sometimes We Realize

Sometimes we realize,

We are running out of time,

To make things right,

For everything to be fine,

When your life,

Is slipping away,

Don’t let sadness,

Be the thing to stay.

Just look back,

At all the great days,

The time of your life,

In many different ways,

When you spent time,

Taking in the sun’s rays,

Look at all the people,

In your life you amaze.

Don’t let the sadness,

Get in your head,

No matter what anyone,

Else may have said,

Even if you think the end,

May be just around the bend,

Your smile, your passion,

Your heart made of gold,

These are the things,

That will never grow old.

And when you think,

Life is falling apart,

Think of the things,

That you learned from the start,

How to take all the love,

You have in your heart,

And spread it,

Farther than the eye can see,

From people like you,

To people like me.

And when in the end,

When you can’t carry on,

You’ll look back at all,

The things that you’ve done,

And see that you,

Had a great life,

Being optimistic,

And avoiding the strife.

And you’ll also know,

That you’ll be remembered,

Forever and ever,

Endlessly and eternally,

As one who was,

More happy and pure,

Than anyone could possibly be…

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Have you ever realized the above message? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

My friend Caleigh Cassidy is becoming an Optimist.  Enjoy her latest video! :)

Please comment below if you enjoyed her video! :)  

Check out her Tumblr blog at http://www.anothertorturedteen.tumblr.com/.

How often do you Smile? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Hurricane Irene has affected us all in one way or another.  This poem goes out to all the people who have had to face the hurricane’s wrath…

The Hurricane’s Wrath

It happened so unexpectedly,

Has affected both you and me,

All along the East Coast,

Saving lives is what mattered most,

Forcing people out of their home,

Leaving them no place left to roam.

It is in this time we need,

To help people out and plant a seed,

A seed of hope that won’t ever go,

To the world we can show,

That we can make it through all this,

That all our strength won’t go amiss,

I know that this will be a long road,

Thanks to the rain,

And the rivers that flowed.

Just think of that neighbor,

That gave you something to eat,

That gave you a place,

To rest your tired feet,

Even when disaster may strike,

The human connection,

Will always be there,

There’s more people that will help you,

Than you are aware.

Now is the time,

To look at what you’ve got,

Deep down inside,

You have a lot,

Even if you lost,

Many a material thing,

You can still be happy,

And your heart can sing.

So don’t let these waters,

Wade you down,

Try to make a smile,

Out of that frown,

Look at the sun shining today,

And just think,

There’s always a way,

Out of the darkness and into the light,

Hurricane Irene won’t win the fight.

We don’t need electrical power,

To be powerful,

We only need each other,

To stay hopeful,

Remember that every,

Day is a gift,

So don’t let your mind,

Get stuck in a rift,

Now it is time,

To stay on the path,

Of optimistic survival,

After the hurricane’s wrath.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Were you affected by Hurricane Irene in some way? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Happiness, the act of feeling, showing, or expressing joy, is something that all of us want to have for the rest of our lives.  It comes from many different actions, from doing well in school to hanging out with friends, and is what we revolve our lives around.  We use happiness in our conversations every day, such as when we say “How are you?” or “Are you happy with it?”  But sometimes happiness may be hard to come by when something goes wrong in our life beyond our control or when we start to think about a sad moment.  During those times, we may believe that we can never be happy again; that happiness is not in our control anymore.  Truth be told though, happiness is in our complete control, both physically and mentally.  Happiness, It’s Your Choice.

Psychology can back me up on this statement.  Let me begin by explaining the science behind happiness.  To trigger the feeling of happiness, one must first be in a situation that would normally cause the feeling.  Once in that situation, the limbic system (mostly the emotion center) of the brain creates neurotransmitters (brain chemicals) that cause you to feel good, smile, and be happy.  These two chemicals are called serotonin and dopamine and they really control how happy or sad you are.  You’ve probably felt the effects of dopamine before during exercise; it was that feel-good, loose feeling you got after stretching or running or any other physical exercise.  So what does all this science mean?  It means that in order to be happy it only takes one happy thought or just simply going to a place that makes you happy.  Just doing that puts the events in motion in your brain to bring about happiness.  On the other hand, thinking sad thoughts or being in a sad place will of course bring about sadness.  So, as you can see, Happiness, It’s Your Choice.

If all of that science did not convince you, then let me give you some more evidence.  All that you need is a simple, 5-letter word, Smile.  We smile every single day of our life, sometimes controllably and sometimes unconsciously.  We smile when we laugh at a good joke, when we say hello to our friends, and even when we just walk into a room full of people.  Smiling can show people that we are not hostile and we are good people.  It really is the simplest thing in the world to do, considering that it takes more muscles to frown.  So how can this help you?  When you are feeling sad and down in the dumps, just smiling can bring you happiness.  When you are happy you smile, that’s pretty obvious.  What’s not as obvious is that smiling can trick your brain and body into being happy since it also releases serotonin and dopamine, which as I said before are the “happiness chemicals.”  So that means, when you smile you can be happy.  Once again, Happiness, It’s Your Choice.

Let me end with a short poem that wraps all of this up:

Smiling is contagious,

you catch it like the flu,

When someone smiled at

me today, I started smiling too.

I passed around the corner,

and someone saw my grin -

When he smiled I

realized, I’d passed it on to him.

I thought about that smile,

then I realized its worth,

A single smile, just like mine,

could travel round the earth.

So, if you feel a smile begin,

don’t leave it undetected -

Let’s start an epidemic quick

and get the world infected!!!

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Do you think Happiness is Your Choice? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Those are the inspiring words that I heard when I went to go see Captain America at the movies yesterday. I can really relate to the quote, and I believe many of you can too. We’ve all seen someone that supposedly has everything and we’ve wanted what they have. But then if we look deeper into their life, we realize they are very arrogant and take what they have for granted. Celebrities have thrown their life away to drug use and criminal actions. They have become full of themselves and have begun to believe that they are the center of attention at all times. I don’t think anyone wants to become like that. Here’s to the weak men and women out there that society has looked past, the men and women I believe to be the strongest of all, in their heart.

I am physically a weak man with my ever-weakening muscles. I’ve had time to look at the world in a unique way. I’ve been through many situations where I cannot do what other people can; situations where I had to realize that I physically could not do something, when mentally I believed I could do it. It is very hard to make that realization without looking down on yourself, which is what I struggled with. I saw others doing, what I had struggled to do, rather easily. This, in the end, made me have a stronger compassion and more gratitude for what I could do.

I may not be able to run a mile, but I can be the mental force behind someone running in a marathon. I may not be able to drive a car, but I can help give driving directions. I may not be able to play a sport, but I can still watch them with my friends. Taking gratitude for these things I could do made me stronger in my heart. Arrogance comes from not being grateful for what you have, so I was able to avoid it as much as I could. But really, is there anyone out there that is truly weak or truly strong?

We each have things that we are stronger at along with things that we are weaker at. By finding the middle ground between our strengths and weaknesses, we can be grateful for our life and give compassion to others that may share our weaknesses. There are some weaknesses we can never truly get rid of, but those are the weaknesses that teach us lessons and make us better people. No one is perfectly strong either; we all have something inside of us holding us back and slowly pulling us down. Life is dependent on a balancing act, where we use our strengths to counteract our weaknesses and use our weaknesses to counteract our strengths. Too much weakness is a bad thing and too much strength is also a bad thing, so try hard to find that equilibrium.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Do you believe Life is a Balancing Act? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Help out the More Than Me Foundation by visiting http://www.morethanme.org/

Can you imagine not being able to get an education? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Humility = Stability

Some are in it for the money or fame,

They make it seem that life is a game,

That you can’t do something,

For nothing,

That everything they do,

Comes down to a price,

You shouldn’t need anything,

To do something nice.

What did we learn,

When we were young?

Before we could talk,

Before we could run,

There’s some things out there,

That should be done,

With no whining, no crying,

No wishing it done.

What am I really,

Trying to say?

The nice things you do,

At night, in the day,

Should not always be,

Along with the pay,

Sometimes its time,

To be humble today.

Although it may,

Feel good to brag,

When life is a bore,

When life is a drag,

But all of that glory,

Has a price tag,

Where in the future,

You’ll pay a price,

With the friends that you lost,

For not being nice.

To do great things,

For nothing in return,

You’ll have a great life,

With all the things that you learn,

And when in time,

The tide does turn,

Finding a person who’ll help you,

Won’t be a concern.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Have you ever helped someone for nothing in return?  Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

“I have low self esteem.”  I have heard those words used as an excuse many times.  Now it is time to get back that self esteem and feel great about you.

Trust me, I used to have low self-esteem about myself too.  I always thought people would not talk to me or be my friend due to being in a wheelchair.  I used to exclude myself from activities and high school football games and dances since I felt so scared of people seeing me and of being social.  My low self-esteem ruined my first two to three years of high school and made it hard for me to live up to my full potential.  It was not until I discovered where my low self-esteem came from, made goals for myself to change it, and did everything I could to maintain feeling good about myself that I finally increase my self-esteem.  And all  of you can do the same as I did.

But where does all this low self-esteem originate from? It could be that you have not felt fully accepted yet and do not believe anything you do is really cared about.  It could also be due to someone making fun of you so much that you believed it to be true.  It could also be something simple; you don’t know how to have normal self-esteem.  I have three simple steps to help those that don’t think highly of themselves.  This could range from beauty to ability to creativity, but all of these issues can be resolved.

Step One: Discover the Problem

What is causing you to have low self-esteem?  It could be any of the reasons that I listed above or something else you can think of.  Write the cause down in either a diary, journal, or just a piece of paper.  Now, what part(s) of your physical, psychological, or mental self do you have low self esteem about?  It could be something as simple as your hair or something more unique such as the sound of your laugh.  Write these down on the piece of paper too.

Step Two: Map Out a Solution

Here comes the more creative part where you have control over what happens next.  For each part of yourself that you wrote down think of one or more situations where your low self esteem came out and write them down next to each part. Next, think of 10 people that have contradicted your belief (for instance: I think people always just look at my wheelchair and not me, but they say they don’t even see the wheelchair anymore).  Write those people down next to each part. These are the people that can help you gain your self-esteem back. Finally, think of a goal to set for the next day, the next week, the next 2 weeks, and the next month for each part to try to reduce that low self-esteem.

For Example:

Next Day: Ask one of the 10 people what they think about me being in a wheelchair

Next Week: Say “Despite my disability, my abilities have no bounds.” whenever I see my disability get in the way

Next 2 Weeks: Don’t let my disability stop me from doing anything

Next Month: If you have completed the goals and feel better about yourself, then you are successful!
If not, start with a small goal, then work yourself up to a larger goal until you feel better about yourself. 

Low self-esteem is not in the control of anyone else, including your friends or family, it is in your complete control.  So as soon as you decide to fight it you can beat it.  Truly, self-esteem is all in your head, so you can shape it to fit your needs.  But don’t fall to high self-esteem and start bragging about yourself, that is the last thing that should happen.  Instead, just worry about feeling good about yourself and not everyone feeling good about you, because we cannot control other people’s minds.  There will always be someone that cares about you, don’t worry about that. :)

Step Three: Maintain Control

If you feel that you are slipping back into your old low self-esteem ways, then the following video might help you out:

Or take a look back at your diary, journal, or piece of paper where you wrote everything down and try to set new goals.  I have no control over whether this process is perfect or works for you, only YOU have that control and only YOU can take a chance, make a change, and breakaway from your low self-esteem.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Do you have low self-esteem? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

I PROMISE. The most abused statement in the world.

It’s a cross between a Yes and a No.  In the dictionary, a Promise is defined as “an undertaking or assurance given by one person to another agreeing or guaranteeing to do or give something.”  But there are some people that don’t keep promises.

I’ve been given a promise many times that was not kept.  The promise is that I can get inside people’s houses with no steps in my way.  I believe their promise when they first tell it to me, but when I actually get to their house there is no possible way for me to get in.  I’ve been in situations where I had to go all the way back home since I could not make it inside.  Remember to always try to keep a promise.

Just follow in the footsteps of Camp Promise, a camp for boys of girls with neuromuscular diseases with no age limit.  The swine flu led to the cancellation of the normal Muscular Dystrophy Association summer camp 2 years ago.  That is when two everyday camp counselors became life changers and made the Promise of a Lifetime.  They got a group together on Facebook with over 1000 members and tried to get camp un-cancelled.  When that did not work they started their own camp out in the state of Washington by raising $20,000; getting 30 counselors; finding a place to have camp; finding sponsors and vendors to make camp fun; and gathering 20+ campers in ONLY 6 weeks!  Two years later, Camp Promise East began in Connecticut and that was the greatest week of the year for all of the campers.  These two counselors made a Promise, forever true and forever honest, that has lasted for and will last for a long time to come.  And this promise changed my life…

I went to Camp Promise East last week and had the time of my life.  I made friends that I will never forget.  I had a chance to feel like one of the boys without my parents around to bug me.  I had a chance to feel fully accepted and part of something more than just myself.  You will hear more about Camp Promise in my next post, but as you can tell, a promise that is kept has indescribable benefits not only to whom the promise was made, but also to the one that made the promise.  I do not want this camp to ever end, and that is also why a promise should be eternal if it can be.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Have you ever broken a promise?  Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

I wrote this poem in 9th grade and it may be able to help the struggling writers out there. :)

Blank Paper

A blank paper before you,

What should you write?

A story, a novel, a mystery, a blight,

A story of a friend you hold dear,

Or one about a thought so near,

You have all the room you ever could want,

So, go ahead, write, take this as a taunt,

I know this is something you want,

If the paper stays blank,

There is no one to thank,

You have an idea,

Just spread it around,

Maybe about living deep underground,

If the paper stays blank,

You are not alive,

Because all humans have stories,

They hold deep inside,

So let it out,

Write about it,

And you will see,

That the paper isn’t blank,

And there is you to thank.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Have you ever had writer’s block?  Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

How it feels to be accepted, is what I feel at Camp Promise East this week. :)

How It Feels

How it feels to be accepted,

Is something I cannot explain,

But it feels like the storm has ended,

And I’m out of the rain,

I cannot thank you enough,

For making my life less tough.

But don’t cry because of me,

My life is great as you can see,

If one day you’re feeling down,

I’ll make a smile out of that frown,

You are the first to hear the words I say,

And make me not want to go away.

If only everyone could be like you,

It would make those like me,

Want to live life through,

Don’t change,

You’re already who you should be,

Don’t change,

You already hold the key,

To a perfect life.

I hope my words make,

You think about every breath you take,

Because there are people out there,

Who have one more breath as their only care,

So I’m asking you to live,

Giving all that you can give.

Thank you for taking the time,

With all my words that rhyme,

To sit and listen to me,

You’ve changed my life, you’ll soon see,

This is only just the start,

Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Have you ever felt truly accepted?  Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

If you sing or act you can probably relate to this song.  Enjoy! :)

Have you ever had Stage Fright? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Enjoy my latest lyrics video for my song “This Feeling”! :)

Have you ever had This Feeling? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

If We Can Do It

They said we couldn’t do it,

That all we do everyday,

Is get up and sit,

They said we’re helpless,

But we proved them wrong,

On the way to success.

Our muscles may be weak,

But we are forever strong,

With our minds this sharp,

Nothing can go wrong,

We take charge of our dreams,

Tackling whatever comes along,

So if we can do it,

So can you.

If we can do it,

So can you,

There ain’t nothing,

You can’t do,

We don’t let anything in our way,

You can do the same day by day,

So get out there,

And take on the world,

If we can do it,

So can you.

I know a guy with DMD,

And he did something amazing to me,

He got married to a beautiful girl,

And he has a brand new daughter,

He is what you’d call a great father,

If he can do it,

So can you.

I know a few men that love politics,

Even though their DNA needs a fix,

They wish they could Stand Up for your rights,

But they can do anything sitting down,

With a new job for a senator in town,

If they can do it,

So can you.

If we can do it,

So can you,

There ain’t nothing,

You can’t do,

We don’t let anything in our way,

You can do the same day by day,

So get out there,

And take on the world,

If we can do it,

So can you.

I know a teacher,

That loves his school,

He teaches kids that music is cool,

Even with BMD,

He can play a C,

What he does is amazing to me,

If he can do it,

So can you.

And then there is me,

Who is as optimistic,

As can be,

I never thought,

I could do anything,

Until I saw the hope,

The above men did bring,

If I can do it,

So can you.

If we can do it,

So can you,

There ain’t nothing,

You can’t do,

We don’t let anything in our way,

You can do the same day by day,

So get out there,

And take on the world,

If we can do it,

So can you.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

If We Can Do It, can’t you?  Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Enjoy my talk with 7 other men with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy at the Annual Parent Project Connect conference.  I hope it can show you that with Optimism you can accomplish your goals and not only survive, but thrive, no matter what disability you may have. If WE can do it, YOU can do it! :)

Will you live life to the fullest like we have? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

I could not have said any the following better myself! Enjoy the following speech written by my new friend with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy, Matthew Denger.  This is life is through our eyes…

Life on Wheels

Written By Matthew Denger

Everyday you may see me driving through the halls of school, usually speeding. You may wonder what is his life like. When I look at my life I would say I live a pretty easy life. I would say I am like everyone else. The only big difference is I use a wheelchair and I am disabled.

As I go through each day I may always need some help. It ranges from many things such as just getting a book or picking up a pencil off the floor. For me it is a pretty normal thing. Some days I do wish I could have some independence and do things myself. Sometimes I even feel bad for even asking for help. I just feel that asking for anything can sometimes be hard. I believe in helping myself. That, however, isn’t all completely possible. I always am thankful for the help I get from my family and friends.

There are times I go places and accessibility can be a problem. Some places do a good job at being accessible and others don’t. There are rules that places have to follow but not everyone does because those rules are 900 pages long. It can be hard to handle but I work my way around it. I always want to go places but I can’t always because there is no ramp or elevator. There have been times when I have been stuck in an elevator. It’s not a fun thing to go through. Sometimes I want to go to other people’s houses and can’t always get inside. I have used a portable ramp to get in a house but that isn’t always going to work. Sometimes people just come to my house just to make it easier for me. I am in Chamber Chorus and we always have a Christmas party and it is done at my house. This makes it simpler for me and my brother. Our wheelchairs just can’t go up stairs.

I sometimes travel places and this also can have factors. I can’t just get into a car and go or go on a plane and wait for take-off. I have a van with a lift and straps to hold my chair down. I also get strapped in my chair like a NASCAR driver. This takes a little longer then just getting right in the vehicle. I also cannot drive myself around. They have the technology for it but it gets expensive. Traveling by plane is a whole different ball game. I can’t bring my electric wheelchair because some planes can’t fit the chair in the cargo or the fear that it would be damaged. I have to use a manual chair and be pushed around. I also have to be transferred from seat to seat. This takes time but most airliners are nice enough to allow us to go on first and sometimes allow us to change our seats if they are too far back in the plane. We have run into people who just don’t understand the trouble we go through and won’t make changes for us. We never show our disappointment.

Helping people understand what I do everyday is hard sometimes. No one knows except me. My disability has shaped me into something people are amazed to see. I work hard to succeed. I want to be able to do something great. Something that will change the world.

My outlook on life has been shaped from my disability also. I believe that life is something to cherish. The most important things I find in life are friends and family. They are always there for me every step of the way. They are the other part besides my disability that makes me who I am. I am thankful to have them around and I always try to let them know. Without them I wouldn’t be myself. I always am willing to meet new people. It’s the best way for me to learn about new things. I believe life is a way to create myself. Each experience makes me learn what I should be. All things happen for a reason and I think they can be tests. These tests help me understand what I must do in life. Sometimes it is hard for me to give up. I never want to because to me it is failure. I do realize I have to sometimes. I always show respect to everyone even if I don’t like them. I am never nasty to people because that is always rude and I don’t want to hurt people. I try and be honest with everyone because honesty is the best policy. I also believe in forgiveness especially forgiving my enemies. I always have trouble forgiving myself but it the end I always do. I never hold a grudge because I think it’s a waste of time and it’s not the point of life to worry about bad things that happen. I try to never judge people. I believe I can be wrong if I do and may realize that they aren’t so bad after all. I always remember my past, live the present, and dream of the future. I always live for today because for all we no there may never be a tomorrow and that is why I live for the now. I enjoy every minute of my life. It is a gift that I always cherish.

I believe I have a purpose in my life. I think I am here to do something great and inspire everyone I meet. One thing I want to do is give something back even greater to those that help me. I also want to show people that life is a great journey. I believe I must serve others. I want to help others so they can help themselves. I believe that if I can show people that I can do great things that they will look up to me and say if he can do it, I can. I am disabled but my mind is still strong. I am like everyone. I have all the same feelings. I don’t consider myself different from everyone. I can’t do everything but I am still human. I want to live life as “normal” as possible. I want to change the world. I am here to help people and that is all I wish to do.

Written By Matthew Denger

©2011 Matthew Denger. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

What does “Normal” mean to you? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Do Me a Favor

Do you think the sun won’t shine?

Do you think life does not matter?

Well all that has to change,

Now its time to rearrange,

Make your life really shine,

I found a way for everything to be fine,

Just do me a favor and smile.

Do me a favor and smile,

Be happy for more than a little while,

Let me see that gleam in your eye,

To let this feeling never die,

That look upon your face,

Is really all it takes,

To change the world.

With all the bad in this world,

Its time for happiness to be unfurled,

It does not matter who you are,

You can still shine brighter than a star,

Black or white,

Straight or gay,

A smile will surely change the way,

You look at every single day.

Some of you may think,

That life will always stink,

That you have to throw your dreams away,

That happiness can never really stay,

But just think back to the time,

When a smile was not a crime,

You were only 8 years old,

And life to you was diamond and gold.

Do me a favor and smile,

Be happy for more than a little while,

Let me see that gleam in your eye,

To let this feeling never die,

That look upon your face,

Is really all it takes,

To change the world.

I’ve seen it for myself,

How a smile can change a life,

Even if it’s full of strife,

I have a disability,

Where everything is harder for me,

But then I figured out,

That happiness was the perfect way,

To a perfect life every single day,

And I wanted to scream and shout,

Tell the world what optimism was about.

And you can do the same,

Cuz life’s not about money or fame,

Not about strife or pain,

Or what in your life you can gain,

It’s about that simple look,

Upon your face,

That makes the world a better place.

Do me a favor and smile,

Be happy for more than a little while,

Let me see that gleam in your eye,

To let this feeling never die,

That look upon your face,

Is really all it takes,

To change the world.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Have you ever smiled all day long?  Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

We spend our whole life trying to make the most money, trying to move on up in the world, trying to get everything that we want.  During this competition we sometimes forget who got us there in the first place and push others out of the way.  In this competition there is never truly a first place, since our wants and needs forever increase.  We want more money and a nice sports car and nice clothes, but do we ever want more friends or more relationships?  It never really seems like that is what we are out to get, but it should be.

These things are what make up The Unforgotten.

Today I went early in the morning to visit my nurse’s father who is 88 years old.  He is an amazing guy that has been through so much in his life.  He has made it through 4 years in World War II and years of raising his family of all daughters.  Most of his long and full life is over and there is no turning back for him.  Like most people at his age, he is slowly losing his memory and has a hard time remembering some things.  What he does remember is the truly inspirational thing, he remembers The Unforgotten.

He remembers the friendships he had over the years.  The time he spent with them is what he lived for.  They were the ones that made him laugh when the days grew dark and made him smile when sun shined. They made him who he is today and he will never forget them.

His friends are The Unforgotten.

He remembers the years of marriage and raising his children from a small baby to a fully-grown adult.  He saw the beauty of life come alive when they were born.  He gave them an education that allowed them to make hundreds of friends along the way. But most importantly, he was able to pass down his beliefs to his children and make them see life through optimistic eyes.

His children are The Unforgotten.

The love he gave to his wife also passed down to his children. She brightened every single day from dawn to sunset.  She helped him take care of his family when times got rough.  She allowed him to follow his passion of singing, albeit just singing lullabies and Sinatra songs to his children.  She transformed him forever and she will never be forgotten.

His wife is The Unforgotten.

But his memory is falling apart for other things. He cannot remember all of the lyrics to his favorite Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin songs that he used to sing in his youth and later on to his children.  He forgets the money he made.  He forgets what kind of car he had or how much it had cost.  He forgets about everything except friendship and love.

So what does all this mean?

It means that the truly important things in life are friendship and love, nothing more than those two short words.  It means that you should not always try to strike it rich and forget about creating and forming relationships with the amazing people around you.  It means that fame does not replace a need for love and friendship.  Near the end of your life, fame will not be important, money will not be important, prosperity will not be important.  What will truly be important will be the children you raised, the love you shared, and the friendships that changed your life.  These things can never be forgotten, no matter what financial state you are in or how bad life gets.  These things are The Unforgotten.

“Money will not change the world, in the end it will only be paper, but love and friendship can change the world, and can never be reduced to nothing.”

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

My friend, Natasha Mikulich, wrote the following poem for my school’s literary magazine and I loved the poem so much I decided to share it with my over 5000 blog visitors! Please comment below if you enjoy it too.

Tear Gas

Written By: Natasha Mikulich

You saw me billow and spray

As you marched for your rights.

I had no understanding

Of your justice less plight.

Simply strewn from the canisters

Thrust by soldiers in blue,

My purpose for creation

Is to mortify you.

I was seen in Quebec

Being held back by cops

As I saw you lined up

Beating metal with rocks.

Looking at your protest

Through that Plexiglas shield,

I saw for myself

That injustice was real.

As I looked at the illness

That I had created,

That moment I realized

Why I was so hated.

Still strewn at your protest

I was given no choice,

Thrown by my maker

To stifle your voice.

I witnessed the coughing,

I witnessed the tears,

And I recalled what I’d caused

For so many years.

Thrown to stop riots

From Birmingham to L.A.,

Yet my presence does not

Make the pain go away.

I am seen as a war hawk

Like the people who use me,

But I’m far beyond tired

Of the constant abusing.

It is not my intent

To stifle your souls.

It’s just that society

Puts us in roles.

My place is to stop you

From fighting “the man”,

No matter how evil

Our actions have been.

So take this apology

However you desire.

I know that my presence

Adds fuel to the fire.

Just know I don’t wish

To cause people such pain,

And your protesting efforts

Are not done in vain.

So when I’m forced to stop

Protestors, fighting and dying,

You must understand,

You’re not the only ones crying.

Written By: Natasha Mikulich

©2011 Natasha Mikulich. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

What does the above poem make you think about?  Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Have you ever wanted to go somewhere you have never been before?

Have you ever passed a restaurant or place while you were driving and thought,
“I wish I could go there” ?

Then it is time for a Decision-Free Day.

Right before I sat down to write this blog entry, I had returned from a 6-hour Decision-Free Day with my nurse with a story that you would think belongs in a week trip. The night before I had called my aide from high school and asked him if he would be home the next morning. He texted me back and said that he would. So the next morning I left all technology and stress behind at 8:30 in the morning and took a half hour ride to his house with my nurse. He showed me his house, his pool, and his cat and two dogs. The three of us sat by the pool and ate potato chips with sour cream and drank some soda. But more importantly, we sat back and talked about our lives and reminisced on the good times we had in high school together. He could have not been happier to see me and we spent about an hour playing War with playing cards next to his pool. Then the three of us went on a walk around his community and he told me everything about his neighbors and how the houses had changed over the years. My nurse and I were going to leave right after our walk was done, but then I had an idea that literally just popped into my head. But unlike I, and probably many of you, usually do, I listened to that idea and went with it.

That took us to the diner about a mile down the road where I had fish and chips, my friend had a grilled cheese with tomato, and my nurse had a chicken sandwich. We continued to reminisce and talk about life during our lunch and had a great day. But yet again, the trip did not end there like it normally would have with all the woes of life. My nurse and I followed my friend and continued another mile or two down the road to a rustic Main Street in an old-fashioned town. The bridge that we crossed overlooked a waterfall and two water wheels churning the water. My nurse and I found a parking spot on the street and took a stroll down the sidewalk looking at the shops that we passed. My friend told me about how all the shops and restaurants had changed and about what used to be there. After walking up and down the street two times we all decided to stop and get some ice cream. I got a flavor called Lobster Tracks with chocolate and red candies and we sat on a bench and yet again talked about life.

This trip made me wonder why everyone spends their days whining that there is nothing to do when there is really a world of excitement waiting for them outside their small, secluded world. It also made me see how fast the world around us can change and how we should take in everything before it disappears from view. Look at how simple everything I did was; it was not like I had decided to go skydiving or anything like that. I had only let my mind and the road take control of my day and turned just a simple visit into an extraordinary and memorable journey.

So take a few hours out of your day, call up that friend you have not seen in years, and go wherever the road may take you. Follow through with any idea that may go through your head and that idea will take you to many other places you never thought you would go. Put your stressed mind and life to the side for a bit and see what the world can truly offer.

Don’t take a sick day; take a Decision-Free Day.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Have you ever taken a Decision-Free Day? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

The Future, Your Fate, the Rest of Your Life is…Unknown.

What do you think your future holds?  Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Love is something we never will truly understand. Love can be lost, but can it truly ever disappear?  I believe it is always there.  Just because a relationship ended and you have not seen the one you once loved for a long time does not mean you can’t remember the good times you had with that person.

I hope you enjoy the latest song I recorded with my uncle on guitar…

Do you think that Love ever truly goes away?  Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Just think for a second.  Just a second. Do you know someone you would do anything for? How many lives have you touched and how many friends have you made in your lifetime? Now think of how many of those friendships and relationships actually lasted.

I know you can relate to this song and would sing it for those friends you hold dear to your heart…

Do you believe Friendship can last a lifetime?  Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

I know it has been over a month since my last post, but I promise I will try to stop taking long breaks from blogging now.  I have been busy preparing for high school graduation and college and also speaking to classes at my high school about optimism.  Enjoy my latest post! :)

To The World

Have you ever

Knew the truth, but decided to lie?

Have you ever

Failed to touch the sky?

Have you ever

Had your dreams slip away?

Well all that’s going to change today.

Because now it’s time to open up,

Open up

To the world,

Go bungee jumping

Without the cord,

Tell your story

Stop being mute,

Skydiving

With no parachute.

And if you say you can’t,

That all your life

Is on a slant,

Get up off that cold, hard ground,

And watch the world go round and round,

It will never stop turning

Through all your pain, your tears,

The lessons you’re learning.

Because now it’s time to open up,

Open up

To the world,

Go bungee jumping

Without the cord,

Tell your story

Stop being mute,

Skydiving

With no parachute.

And when you look back and see

What opening up has made you be,

You’ll be speechless

By the cleaned up mess,

The path you have taken

Is the one to success,

Keep telling your story

Because life never rests.

Because now it’s time to open up,

Open up

To the world,

Go bungee jumping

Without the cord,

Tell your story

Stop being mute,

Skydiving

With no parachute.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

How can you live life to the fullest?  Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

My newest best friend wrote the poem below and I thought it was the MOST BEAUTIFUL POEM EVER! Please let this currently unknown master poet what you think about her poem since, like every artist, she does not believe her poem is as amazing as I think it is.  Everyone has a talent, but it is not until they share that talent with the world that they can reach their full potential, and that is where you guys come in.

Please click here to leave a comment and let her know how amazing her poem is! :)

Don’t Throw Away the Key

Once again defeated you fall to the ground

Broken into pieces, and you keep going down

And when everything is wrong you relieve it with more pain

Feels better for a second, but you know it’s just insane.

So hide away your problems, like you always do

Put on that fake smile, but tell yourself it’s true

No one will ever know that you’re bleeding inside

Don’t want your fear to take away your pride.

So put it in a box and never let it go

And if you add a lock then no one will ever know

The secrets, the pain, your traumas and your fears

The stuff that piles up after so many long years

But by hiding all your problems you can never let them go

So stop crying alone maybe it’s time that they should know

Learn to trust, know they care, and open up your heart

Break free of the pain by making a new start.

So…Let it out! (Let it out)

Let them see! (Let them see)

That there is more to you than what they expect you to be

Let it out! (Let it out)

Let them know (Let them know)

That you have another side that doesn’t always show

So let them see (Let them see)

Who you are (Who you are)

Because hiding things away won’t get you very far.

Sitting in your room crying, alone again

And at times like these you wish you had real friends

Maybe forgetting the pain will make it go away

But if you don’t accept it then it will always stay

So take a deep breath and let it go

The answer to your problems might be closer than you know

Don’t keep the agony bottled up inside

At some point even the toughest people have cried.

But when I look in the mirror I hate what I see

How is it possible for someone to be as ugly as me

Tired eyes and broken dreams

I wonder if life is as hard as it seems?

But you’re beautiful so be who you wanna be

The only person judging you is the reflection that you see

Be outrageous and express how you feel

What matters is what’s inside so make sure it’s real

So…Let it out! (Let it out)

Let them see! (Let them see)

That there is more to you than what they expect you to be

Let it out! (Let it out)

Let them know (Let them know)

That you have another side that doesn’t always show

So let them see (Let them see)

Who you are (Who you are)

Because hiding things away won’t get you very far.

And as time goes by this aching will no longer exist

No more problems, no more fears, no more cuts on your wrist

Maybe the old scars still might remain

But after awhile you will no longer feel the pain.

So let out all your problems, they all want to know

You’re loved by many people even if it doesn’t always show

Have faith in yourself and never forget

All that you’ve overcame, the blood and the sweat.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Have you pretended to be someone you aren’t?  Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

I am finally back to updating my blog after 3 weeks of a hiatus.  I have been so busy with school work…and also with inspiring others close to home.

I have two shout outs I would like to make:

“Hello MS. ERNST’S 6th and 7th period classes and MS. CUTLER’S 7th period class. Thank you all for listening to my words of optimism; I hope I have put a smile on your face. It was an honor to speak to you and I hope I have changed some lives. I am always free to chat on Facebook or hang out on the weekends. Feel free to add me as a friend on Facebook. YOU are all inspirations, don’t forget that! :)”

This goes out to MRS. O’BRIEN’S 3rd and 5th period classes. I am always free to talk on Facebook and to hang out on weekends. Thank you so much for accepting me and wanting to know about life from my perspective. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.  Remember to always stay OPTIMISTIC!!! :)

I Am Here

The kids shivering in the cold,

The pain never grows old,

Only one smile will change,

Their lives forever,

But there’s no one out there,

No one to care.

They have a voice,

But they are not heard,

They have eyes,

But cannot see,

They have beliefs,

But they’re ignored,

But not anymore,

Not anymore.

Don’t call me the Messiah,

My help shall not tire,

I do it at no cost,

With me no one is lost,

One day at a time,

The smiles slowly form,

One day at a time,

Away goes the storm.

Lost in the forest of darkness,

I am the light,

Lost in a dream,

I am reality,

Lost in love,

I am the matchmaker,

No one will be lost again,

Not with me standing by,

Because I am here.

The revolution is upon us,

No one in our way,

I’ll make it so you want,

To live another day,

The world won’t change for you,

I must be the one to change it,

You’ll life will be forever different,

From where it may now sit.

Lost in the forest of darkness,

I am the light,

Lost in a dream,

I am reality,

Lost in love,

I am the matchmaker,

No one will be lost again,

Not with me standing by,

Because I am here.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Are there people to turn to when life gets rough?  Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Whatever is Given

Why is everyone so angry,

When I am happy?

They get angry,

At anything that’s different,

They are not used to change,

But I am,

So why can’t they just,

Be like me?

I am happy,

With whatever you give me,

I am very used to change,

I know that when,

Anything goes wrong,

I’m ready to get through it,

Again and again and again,

And again and again…

I know a guy,

Who has nothing at all,

Just his family,

And very few friends,

He goes through each day,

Always happy,

Making sure,

Everything is okay.

He is happy,

With whatever he’s given,

He is very used to change,

He knows that when,

Anything goes wrong,

He’s ready to get through it,

Again and again and again,

And again and again…

My friend knows this girl,

Who is at the top of the world,

But to her it’s really the bottom,

She’s the CEO,

Of a big company,

That’s now about to go bankrupt,

Even through all of this,

She’s never lost hope.

She is happy,

With whatever she’s given,

She is very used to change,

She knows that when,

Anything goes wrong,

She’s ready to get through it,

Again and again and again,

And again and again…

Everyone should be happy,

With whatever they’re given,

They should be very used to change,

They should know when,

Anything goes wrong,

They will be ready to get through it,

Again and again and again…

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Are you happy with Whatever You’re Given? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Just One Word

One hello can change the world,

Two hello’s can change your life,

More than two,

You will survive,

You need hello’s to stay alive.

So I dare you to go,

Out into the world,

And say hello to everyone you see,

It will show them your true love,

When life becomes push and shove.

Put a smile on your face,

Take away disgrace,

Give happiness a taste,

Make your heart open spaced,

Live your life as far as it can go,

You’ll change some lives,

Hey, you never know.

Remember how you felt,

When you thought,

Your heart would melt,

You took one step ahead,

But took a step back instead,

Until you saw that smile,

On a stranger’s face,

You picked yourself off the floor,

And knew inside,

You could do much, much more!

You’ve stood in their shoes,

When you thought,

That you would lose,

You’ve been there before,

Felt like asking for more,

So now you got to smile,

[Stay here a while]

Give all that you can give,

[Stay here a while]

Brighten someone’s day,

[Stay here a while]

You couldn’t want it any other way.

Smile,

Don’t frown,

Say hello,

Not goodbye,

Smile,

Smile,

Hello,

How are you?

Just say hello,

And smile…

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Have you said Hello to everyone you pass? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

I just heard the optimism of a grandmother of a child with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy. It brought me the verge of tears and I know it will deeply affect you.  After reading this, please feel free to leave a comment describing something you’d do for a loved one, your daughter, your son, your friend, anyone you hold dear. Click Here to Leave a Comment.

“I drink in every day that I have with my grandson and I file it away in the deep recesses of my mind to be called up when I will want to look back at the memories. I feel so blessed to have him in my life. He will never probably experience the girl/boy love thing. He gets crushes on girls on TV. But I think that’s ok with him. He lives in his world of video games, listening to music, playing on the computer and the love of his papa and me. He is happy as a lark.

I sometimes cry inside when I think of what he has before him and what all of you have before you physically as time goes on. I get angry and I want to do something about it so bad. No wants to see a loved one go through anything. But I don’t dwell on it. I dwell in the moment. It’s a gift to have each and every moment with him. I am here to help him through his journey every step of the way. It’s my mission in life. It’s my lot in life. I am his advocate when he can’t express what he needs, I am his fierce protector; I am everything I need to be for him. I see my grandson as a gift from God.

Kids who don’t deal with the things you all deal with don’t know how good they have it. It only shows what you are made of! That is my point, the mindset, the attitude; it’s wonderful. Life is a gift. Yes, some people are dealt a worse hand than others, but look at what they do with it. That’s the beauty of it. I sometimes wonder. How would I feel? I try to put myself into the place of someone disabled in a wheelchair, and I really can’t. And why is that? Because I’m not in a wheelchair. I’m not disabled. But then there are all kinds of disabilities. There is the disability of intolerance and ignorance at people who are physically challenged. Now that’s a deep statement isn’t it?“

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Have you ever tried to be Optimistic? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Through the Eyes of a Child

Through the eyes of a child,

I am something different,

Something they have never seen before,

Children look at me,

With faces in the shape,

Of confusion and dismay.

They think inside,

Why can’t he walk?

Can he talk?

And they stare at me.

I know they do this,

By the look on their face,

They try to hide it,

But it is always there.

I do not like to see it,

But it’s a good thing,

That it’s there,

Without it the world,

Would be a different place.

I am glad that,

Soon they will learn,

That everyone is different,

And no one is the same.

I may be different,

But so is everyone else.

I am not the only one,

That is what I teach,

To children that see me.

Whether I like it or not,

That is how they see,

The world around them,

One day they will learn,

And become a mature adult,

Until that day comes,

They are seeing through,

The eyes of a child.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Have you ever been seen in a different way? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Over 1100 visitors from California to Australia, its Unbelievable how far this blog has reached!

Hola España and Puerto Rico, G’Day Australia, Γεια σας Greece, hei Finland, halo Malaysia नमस्ते India, merhaba Turkey, สวัสดี Thailand, and привет Russia. Hello South Africa, California, New York, United Kingdom, Wisconsin, Georgia, Arizona, Texas, Missouri, Canada, Kansas, Louisiana, Mississippi, Tennessee, Kentucky, Indiana, Iowa, Illinois, Ohio, West Virginia, Pennsylvania, and New Jersey.

If you read this blog from any of these states or countries please comment and tell me what brought you to my blog and what you enjoy about it too.  If I missed any state or country on this list, please comment and let me know.

Click Here to Leave a Comment.

From the Outside Looking In

From the outside looking in,

Where do I begin?

I’ve been on the outside all my life,

Trying to stand it with all my might.

People running,

I’m sitting,

Cannot keep up,

Going to a friend’s house,

And not being able to get in,

From the outside looking in,

But now I am able to begin,

Anew,

And realize what,

I’ve been through.

Its not as bad as many have had to do,

I have a great life,

Not full of strife,

And have many friends,

Who will be there till all ends.

I may not be like everyone else,

I am unique,

Nothing a matter with that,

If I am on the outside looking in,

There is no possible way to win.

So that is why I deal with what I’ve got,

Because if I don’t,

Then I might be on the outside,

One day,

Not being able to look in.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Have you ever been On the Outside Looking In? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Over 1000 Visitors in Only 3 Weeks! Thank You to Everyone Reading My Blog!

Keep Sharing the Optimism My Friends!

Don’t Let Fame Take Control

He had everything,

A nice sports car,

A house by the shore,

The big role,

In the next big movie,

Even his own chauffeur,

But what he didn’t have,

Was her.

She had all she wanted,

A large family,

In a small town,

And so many friends,

But nothing more,

Her love had left her,

But all that she wanted,

Was him.

He let fame,

Take control,

He had everything,

He could ever need,

But nothing that he wanted,

But did he know love is not worth losing,

Over fame?

He always had her,

In the back of his mind,

She always had him,

In the back of her mind,

Their love was strong,

But what could they do?

He lived in Hollywood,

She was so far away,

He was famous,

She was happy,

He thought he had everything,

She knew that she didn’t.

He started to change,

Quit the movie,

Escaped in the dead of night,

Drove across the country,

Trying to find her,

He was crazy in love.

She saw him in the doorway,

Couldn’t believe her eyes,

She didn’t even ask why,

Came up and kissed,

Her only guy,

Fame wasn’t important anymore,

He only needed her,

He had learned his lesson,

The only way he could.

Don’t let fame,

Take control,

You’ll have everything,

You could ever need,

But nothing that you want,

Love is not worth losing,

Over fame.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Have you ever let Fame Take Control? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Almost 1000 readers of this blog and it has only been about 3 weeks since I started it.  I thank all of you from the bottom of my heart for reading and continuing to read my blog.

I have heard many stories about people that have been affected by my blog.  I am glad I was able to dry some tears, put a smile on some of your faces, or just help you find have the power to make it through the day.  If you know me and want to talk to me I am always free to talk.  Helping others is what I created this blog for and it makes my day whenever I can help anyone out.  I cannot wait to talk to some of you and hear your stories because your stories are truly important to me.

Don’t You Forget

Throughout all these years,

So much has changed,

Nothing’s the same,

And never will be again.

But don’t you forget,

All the love we once shared,

Don’t you forget,

All the great days we had,

Don’t you forget.

For all these years,

For all this time,

Don’t you forget,

Never forget.

Time may be between us,

But I will never forget,

How your eyes lit up,

When you saw me,

All the joy we shared.

Through all eternity,

Through all my life,

Nothing can break,

Nothing can break,

The bond we share.

But don’t you forget,

All the love we once shared,

Don’t you forget,

All the great days we had,

Don’t you forget.

For all these years,

For all this time,

Don’t you forget,

Never forget.

©2011 Anthony’s Abilities. Please contact me and ask for permission before using this writing.

Have you known someone you won’t forget? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Love is not something we can describe, see, taste, or hear.  Love is not the brightness to every day and not the escape from reality people make it.  Love cannot make sense, cannot be understood, cannot be characterized by words alone.  Love is what it wants to be when it wants to be.  Love does not need an introduction or a conclusion.  Love just is what everyone feels once in their life and are always confused by every time they feel it.  Let love be whatever it wants to be and let it in when it comes.  Let it go when it wants to leave.

Have you ever tried to describe or define love? Comment below to answer.

© 2011, The Optimist’s Guide. All rights reserved.

Say Goodbye to Curiosity

Say goodbye to curiosity,

Everything will soon be clear,

The storm clouds will disappear,

There’ll be no secrets,

As long as you’re near,

Cuz everything will soon be clear.

My love to you,

Is like a song,

A song that’s never-ending,

A song that’s mind bending,

I thought that song would stay inside,

And never come out and play,

But now that it has,

And now I must tell all.

When we first met,

I closed my eyes,

And thought it was a dream,

I’d never seen,